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The good news is that the neurologist was pretty sure he'd found was what wrong with me. He made me do all sorts of goofy shit like walking a straight line, standing on one foot with my eyes closed. Then he made me lay with my head off the edge of a table and forced my head back and forth and told me to look in extremely opposite directions. I didn't know this, but I've since learned on YouTube, that when you're experiencing vertigo your eyes go through a certain REM. And based on the pattern that your eyes jerk around they can tell you exactly which ear has the problem.

I have what is called benign positional vertigo. It's called "benign" because in and of itself it causes no harm to anything, although it does freak people out and make them think they have tumors and whatnot. But what it is is actually an inner ear malfunction that can be brought on by everything from an ear infection to absolutely no reason. You have three semi-circular canals in your inner ear on the X, Y, Z coordinate planes. Each one is filled with fluid and has a hair with a calcium carbonate rock on the end. When you turn your head certain directions the fluid flows and pushes on the rock letting your brain know that you've moved to a certain position. Well pieces of that calcium carbonate can break off and become free floating in to the canal, running into things and causing the sensation of motion.

To flush these particles out of the canal you do what is called the Epley Maneuver, which basically consists of laying down with your head at certain angles with respect to gravity. And switching between each position will cause fluid to go in just one direction hopefully taking any dislodged rocks along with it. It's the simplest, least invasive cure to any disease I've ever seen. And I am thrilled to say it is working for me. I'm like 3 days now no sudden overwhelming vertigo. So yay.

Unfortunately, the anxiety associated with thinking I'm gonna die at any moment is lingering. I've read websites that say your body just becomes sort of addicted to that adrenaline rush of anxiety. After a while instead of thoughts causing the chemical reaction, it's actually the chemical reaction that causes the thoughts. And you have to really concentrate to break that association and wean yourself from that addiction. I liken it to losing weight. It's really easy to sit around and get fat, but to get skinny again takes a concerted effort. So I've been really trying to remain.calm and do things that are relaxing at night like taking baths, reading, and going to bed early. I would have to say it gets better almost every day, but like tonight I drank a beer and was all dizzy in the head walking home and now I'm all worked up that the calcium carbonate rocks were just one problem in a sea of many. Gotta do my best to break that train of thought.

So the saga continues. I think through sleep, exercise, multivitamins, yoga and massages I will see the light on the other side. I will tell you this though, it gives me a whole new appreciation for psychiatric medicine. I would NOT want to live like this forever just gripped by fear for no reason. I've always been of the mindset that people should just get over it, but now having experienced the truly involuntary reactions in my brain, I know that it is not an option. But hopefully the more dizzy-free days I have the more relaxed I will become. But I think I will remain forever grateful if this does pass that I am able to live a normal life. Here's hopin.

But at least now if any of you experience sudden overwhelming vertigo you can laugh it off because now you know it's probably just rocks in your ears.

My hypochondria strikes again. Ever since the last ER scare, I just haven't been 100% satisfied that all systems are go. And you always hear about those people that have like a persistent problem and are told again and again and again that nothing is wrong, only to find out their own intuition was right and there's some huge devastating problem. I really don't like to think of this as a psychosis because I'm not completely obsessed, but when I sit at the computer on a Monday morning with my fingers on my pulse and count that every fourth beat of my heart is skipped, I get concerned. I could ignore it and see what happens or I could take advantage of my totally bomb health insurance while I've still got it and go get checked out. (Because my company is switching insurance providers, not because Obama is taking it away.)

So I scheduled an appointment that day for a stress test. And let me just tell you, it was awesome. Everyone should do it just for fun. Like I did. You go in and get hooked up to all the regular EKG stuff that I'm practically bored with these days. They take a bunch of baseline measurements and then you lay on a table and they get out the ultrasound machine to take a sonogram of your heart. I was able to lie on the table and watch each part of my heart expand and contract and could see each little valve flip open to let the blood through. They even used the same technology used in a doppler radar to measure the speed of the blood as it went through my heart. It was so damn cool. The guy even showed me my lungs and my liver and if I took a deep breath in, they would shift my heart over and throw it out of focus.

Then you run on a treadmill until you hit like 190 bpm on your heart rate. So I was truckin it up a steep incline. And as soon as you reach it, you jump on the table and take some more ultrasounds. Basically, no doctor has reviewed my results, but the technician said everything looked completely healthy and normal. I asked him about skipped beats and he told me something I had never known before. The heart isn't controlled by the brain. It's the only organ capable of producing its own contractions completely independently. So even though it should always work, occasionally it can screw up because of a million different reasons. He has a friend whose heart skips beats when she drinks orange juice. The body is a complicated machine. So if you heart messes up some how, it is capable of realizing this, and "skipping a beat" so that it can completely drain the blood out and start the process over. And sometimes this causes a large pause, and because of different pressures all around, it can cause discomfort or pain. And as long as every beat isn't a skipped beat over the course of an hour, there is no reason to be alarmed when it happens. Even though, for the record, this has been happening to me for a few hours at a time at least once a week. So I think it was okay to go get checked.

Anyway, it was flippin sweet and I encourage everyone to do it.

I tried to post yesterday, but I guess Earthlink was having a problem with their servers. Everything on the internet worked except for my webpage. I blogged in Notepad so that I wouldn't lose the thought, but I didn't save it because I was just going to cut and paste it later when everything was working. Last night I was pretty sick so I stayed home and went to bed and then Daniel came home around 3. He hates the sound of the fan in my laptop so he turned my computer off before he got in bed. Long story short (which is pointless to say after you've already told the long story), I lost what I was going to say.

I do know that 95% of the reason I was blogging was to show you my St. Patrick's Day cake. I can't wait to win the lottery and go to culinary school and do shit like this all day long. It started off as a practice cake for Daniel's birthday cake next month, but as soon as I finished, realized the icing was green, and remembered it was St. Patty's Day, I dressed it up with the yellow. Thank g*d I have cake decorating materials on hand at all times. The best part is, the reason the icing is green IS BECAUSE IT'S MADE FROM AVOCADOS. Have you ever heard of anything so crazy? If you watch Alton Brown you have. I have to say, it is curiously delicious. It's light and fresh and citrusy with the lemon juice and orange extract I added. I think it will be a big hit. If you want to try it, you'd better hurry over before Daniel devours the whole thing. He's quite the cake-eater.

I hope everybody had a lovely St. Patrick's Day filled with green beer and devoid of green hangovers. Laaaaaaaaate.

Whew. Thank g*d that is over! No, I'm not talking about the holidaze; I'm talking about the plague I came through this week. On Xmas night, I went with Ryan S■■■ to have a few beers, came home, went to bed nearly sober. I woke up about an hour later and the onslaught of vomit, et. al., began. It lasted well into the morning where I found myself so dehydrated and so weak I was unable to hold myself up to throw up anymore, so I just kind of rested my head on the toilet seat and then slumped to the ground.

Something similar happened to me once in college and I ended up getting carted out of the dorm on a stretcher and into an ambulance. So I figured that might be a good idea again. But my insurance company has a 24 hour nurse hotline that I'm in the habit of calling before going to the ER, because that shit's expensive. The nurse wasn't too concerned with my symptoms and taught me how to rehydrate myself without enducing more vomit. I wanted to share it with you all. If you throw up, you should wait an hour before you attempt to eat or drink anything. Then after one hour you can begin to drink one ounce of water every 20 minutes. I did that, threw up one more time, tried it again, and it finally worked.

So there I was at 8 in the morning, freezing cold, sweating, shaking, my lips are dry and my stomach is tumbling, holding onto a shot glass filled with tap water watching the clock waiting for the next time that I can start sipping my meager nourishment again. It sucked so bad.

But, 16 hours later, I had progressed to crackers, and 24 hours later, I was basically fine. Still, it was awful. But at least the next time it happens I'll know what to do.

Other than that Xmas was good. Lots of little kids. Five total nieces and nephews this year. It's a far cry from the adult-only Xmases of yesteryear where everything was accompanied by a glass of scotch. But it was fun to convince a toddler that a fat man with a sack of toys climbed down the chimney while she was taking a nap. I've never really gotten to do that.

I got a wine fridge for Xmas. My brother Michael from California got it for me. It holds 28 bottles! I'm trying to figure out the best way to stock it. I might just buy a case of my favorite wine and then fill in the rest a few bottles at a time. But shit, 28 bottles is a lot. So if you want to bring me some wine, feel free, I have plenty of real estate.

In other news, Daniel has been in California for a long time now. He met up with his old baby sitter while he was there (he grew up there). She is now married to the brother of the mom from Mr. Belvedere! I'm not sure how that fact came to light, but it's true. Beeeoooowwwwww Streaks on the china! He said they're going to try to get me an autographed picture from her. I would truly cherish it. He also said they're going to give her my webpage address so she can see my Mr. Belvedere montage. That would rule. So if you're her, then welcome! I'm a huge fan. And we just might live the good life yet!

A lot of bodily functions make sense to me. If dirt gets into your nose, you sneeze it out. If you get a scratch, a scab forms. If smoke gets in your eyes, you cry. If you chug a pitcher of beer in under a minute, you throw it up. It all makes sense.

What doesn't make sense to me is a runny nose. Why on earth does your nose drip mucus when you have a cold? Like what fucking purpose does that serve? It doesn't even crust over to prevent further contamination, just a steady stream of liquid snot running down your face. I'm gonna have to ask Darwin about that one.

So the good news is, my throat doesn't hurt at all so I probably don't have strep. But I do have a hell of a cold. And after an entire day of blowing my nose into work-bathroom-paper towels, my nose is red and raw. Shit hurts. On the way home, I decided to stop and get some proper Kleenex. And I found the best Kleenex ever -- Puff's. I got the kind with lotion in them. Not only do they not hurt, but they have reversed the pain I've spent the day accumulating. I'd go so far as to say blowing my nose on them feels good. I'm so happy that I decided to blog with the sole intention of product placement.

So everyone with this bug that's going around, go out and buy yourself some Puff's Plus. Because a nose in need deserves Puff's indeed.

I've had this stupid nagging cough for almost two weeks now. It is really starting to get old. I lay awake at night hacking up a lung and I can't sleep and it's affecting the quality of my life. Before I went to Kaylyn's birthday party, I went to a doctor to make sure I wouldn't get her sick. He said my cough actually wasn't caused by disease but was just a bronchial irritation. I relayed this information to the guys at work and we decided that the sleep rules are actually to blame.

You see, I sleep at 65 degrees every night now. It feels great. But the other thing that cold air does is give up moisture easily. So effectively what I'm really doing is breathing in cold ass, dry ass air all night long and it eventually started to adversely affect me. So I did the only logical thing. I bought a humidifier. It's a really nice humidifier that can control to a set point. So now I'll be livin' at 50% humidity no matter what the temperature is in my apartment. I think it's really important to be totally in control anyway.

But that doesn't arrive until tomorrow. In the meantime I filled a couple of prescriptions that the doctor gave me. One's a pill to like get rid of the inflamation in my chest and the other is ... drum roll please ... cough syrup with codeine! YAY! Sippin' on some sizzurp! This is good news because my last bottle just expired. That should save me some money on alcohol this weekend.

Andy, the old roommate from back in Feb-Apr has been staying with me this week. I took him to my gym a couple of times since he is a personal trainer, fully willing to pay the ridiculous 20 dollar guest fee, but it turns out I get two free guest passes each month. So if anybody ever wants to go with me let me know. I work out 7 days a week now. Did you know that? It's true.

Well, I've just made some delicious chicken breast tacos so I might have to go indulge. Peace out, sluts.

I went to my first happy hour in a while yesterday at the Flying Saucer with Max and Karen, old engineering technologies buddies. We had a fantastic time, a few beers, some delicious bratwurst with saurkraut and mustard. I came home fairly early, sat on the computer, and then went to bed in accordance with the sleep rules.

As it turns out, what I had done there was concoct the perfect recipe for heartburn. I've never had heartburn before, but from what I experienced and what I read, that's what it had to be. I was up literally all night trying to swallow down that acid in the back of my throat. By morning, I was fighting back the urge to vomit. I knew I had to go to work to at least give someone the work computer I've been using. So I went there first, and that's when time ran out. I threw up in the work bathroom and then came home. I absolutely feel like shit and I don't know what to do about it. Now that the burning sensation is gone, I'm left with a terribly sore throat and an excess of mucus. I'm not sure what to do.

Tell you one thing, though. My finances are in a dire situation. I think from this point forward, I am going to go back into the Febrehabruary mode. Not so strict, but I'm definitely curbing my spending a lot from now on. I need, need, need to pay off my significant credit card debt from Europe before I go to Australia on June 30. It's not like people are knocking down my door to hang out with me anyway, but I just thought I'd let you all know that my life from now until Australia will be a game of saving money, eating chicken breasts, working out and sleeping.

Is anybody going to see Star Wars tonight? Let me know how it is.

I decided to take another day off work. My sleep sched was all wonky from sleeping all day Monday and I wasn't feeling quite 100% although I am much, much better. Plus, when you douche out the work stall, people don't really want you to return too soon. I left the alarm off in anticipation of sleeping in as late as I wanted on a week day -- a rare treat.

OR IS IT, SEAN? At the ripe old hour of 10:00am, I get a rude awakening from Sean W■■■■ who is stranded on the side of the street with a flat tire. Wouldn't have been an issue if his spare wasn't already on his car. Sigh. Ever the helpful friend, I got out of bed, slapped on some clothes and picked him up. First, we had to go pick up his paycheck. I got to see Ryan S■■■ and see where he works. It is the most fabulous warehouse I have ever seen. Then we went and cashed said paycheck in order to pay for the tow truck. Okay, all of this is leading somewhere; bear with me. While we waited for the tow truck, we sat and discussed hair. Duh.

Sean said something to the effect of, "Blah blah blah bah bah got my hair relaxed blah bah blab blah." Hark?! I thought only women of African descent got their hair relaxed. This was an option for me? I got on the horn with my friend Chad who works at Toni & Guy and booked myself an appointment for the afternoon. A hair procedure I have never done before? You know, just when you think the world is going to end because you woke up at 10, jesus swoops in and shows you that everything happens for a reason.

This is the greatest invention of all time. I haven't been this excited about my hair since I discovered the flat iron. It smelled pretty bad, but it didn't burn at all. Apparently this is a new product more tailored toward fair-haired members of society so it isn't as harsh. I don't like to think of it as relaxing my hair, thats too harsh, I like to think I chillaxed it. When I step out of the shower now, it already looks like I've spent 30 minutes flat ironing. It's incredible. I've been using your product for a day now, and I'm still excited.

Is it ironic that something called "straightening" has made me even gayer?

I hung out with my mother all night because I had to file my taxes with my dad. Let's just say my tax refund is about 3X what I was expecting. Whoo hoo PAR-TAY! Instead of my cardio workout, I sat around eating cheesecake and ice cream with my mother. She doesn't like the idea of me trying to lose weight, but I think that's because her loving-mother-vision penetrates my multiple layers of viscous whale fat. Alas, it was a good time. I guess I'll go to work tomorrow in hopes that I can keep from upchucking during the day. g*d, that's so unbecoming. Later, skids.

Happy Valentines Day, sluts! Mine started off with a bang! Normally on Vday, I drink a whole lot. This has been a tradition for the past 5 years. I was kind of at a loss wondering how I would celebrate (or exactly the opposite of celebrate) this year. I got my answer in the form of disease.

I went to work this morning and was blissfully programming along when all of a sudden it felt like someone had turned the heat on. I rolled up my sleeves and kept going. A few minutes later it felt like someone was holding a blow dryer to my face. I was sweating profusely and had like the top 4 buttons undone on my shirt. I could feel the heat pouring out of my shirt on my chin. One of my co-s walked by and I was like, "Hey, is it really, really, really, really hot in here?" and he was like "Uhhhh no ... you don't look so good let me feel your forehead ... damn, you are on fire." And then this other guy walked by and was like, "David, seriously, you are WHITE." Never the one to lose my sense of humor, I was like, "Okay, okay, I know I need to start tanning, this is hardly the time to bring it up."

A few more minutes and it was to the races! A race to the facilities that is. Yes, dear friends, I started off the day with a technicolor yawn in the work bathroom. How embarassing. And to add to the embarassment, this is the first work day after I told one of the managers I was bulemic. We went to a pizza buffet for lunch and I was like, "Ugh, I don't need another piece but I'm going to have one. Not like it matters, I'm just gonna throw it up when we get back to the office." Now he probably thinks I was just regurgitating my breakfast. Great.

After a few more jokes (including calling it a technicolor yawn) I was prodded out the door by everyone who did not want whatever it was that I have. Everyone has been sick in my department this year except for me and one other guy. And we had bet lunch on who would succomb to the bug this year first. Damnit, now I owe him lunch. I think it was Raul who said he hates it when people say "there's a bug going around" because its like saying "it's not the heat, it's the humidity." I thought that was funny.

Alright, kids, it's time for me to fall back asleep. This being sick thing isn't half bad. I hope you're all having a much better Valentine's Day than me. Woe is me! To be sick on my second favorite made-up holiday after Easter! I wish you all lots of action on this manufactured day for gratuitous sex, and I'll catch you all ... on the flip side. Peace.

This weekend went by rather uneventfully, which was fine. I didn't go anywhere from Easter. Not that I had a lot to do in College Station, but I was still sick and having trouble breathing for extended periods of time so I decided to just waste my days away sitting on my favorite couch watching my favorite TV shows. It was a wonderful time. Almost everyone I knew went to their respective homes to celebrate the day with their family so I was a little bored.

Last night I went out to Northgate with Stino and the crew and had a few beers. I wasn't sure if it would be a good idea or not since I was sick and it was cold and rainy and there were no places open past 1:00. So we got kicked out of Duddley's at 1:00 with full chuggers of beer and nowhere to go. People were suggesting that we 'chance it' and drive home with our beers, but you know me and you know I wasn't down with that. We ended up on the porch of Gatsby's finishing up our beers before we could go in and drink their beer. We ended up pouring some out on their fabulously sodded back porch (all the grass is so dead, its extremely tacky and stupid). Anyway, in the end I decided it was a good idea to have gone drinking because I woke up this morning feeling much better than I have the past few mornings. That is a good thing.

David27 went to Houston to see his family. He just came home today and called me on his way to let me know that he had gotten me a present. I was decidedly excited. He couldn't drop by and give it to me but he did tell me what it was. He got me a fish! He had read my webpage saying that I wanted a fish but didn't know how to take care of one so he bought me a beta, since they require minimal upkeep. I've decided to name him 28 in honor of our good friend 27. I am going to love him and hug him and squeeze him. I think he's going to bring him over tomorrow and I can't wait. I'll take a picture of him and share it with you all when he does. Later you have nots!

I guess everyone wasn't as excited about my flowers as I am. I continue to grow more excited each and every day as they continue to grow. The day that one of them blooms, drink are on me! (No, thats not a typo -- drink are on me!) In other news, Owen and I finished rearranging the living room finally. Everything is at an angle, but they're at different angles. It's very avant-garde. The spaces left in the corners by furniture being at wonky angles allowed me to put a little bit of back lighting, which I think really pulls the whole room together. Yay me.

Last night I went over to David27's to watch a movie with our old friend Michael P■■■. Good times. We watched Party Monster. It was a pretty good movie, I missed the beginning, but if you get a chance to see it I recommend. I brought a bottle of wine as per Mr. P■■■' request, and then he decided he didn't want to drink. But David27 did not have a corkscrew, so using a round thing and a hammer, Michael hammered the cork into the bottle instead of pulling it out. Ingenious. I never would have thought to do so. Why, oh why must I always think inside the box?

I've decided not to return home for jebus's second birthday. I would have to drive there and back all in like one day and I hate doing that. Plus the whole church fiasco will reer its ugly head betwixt the parentals and I. Besides that, I think I am deathly ill. It feels like someone has been standing on my chest for like 2 days now. And I can cough until the cows come home but nothing will come up. Maybe I'll try not smoking and see how that affects things. As it is, pity me! I'm sick! Check you sluts later.

I'm sick as a dog. The idiots at the quack shack said it was some kind of throat infection and gave me the same generic medicine they always do. Oh well, maybe it will help. Might as well take it. I didn't sleep a wink last night. I ended up taking a bath at like 5am cause I was so achy and sweating. Today's not much better. Enough pissing and moaning though. Pity me!

I was laying on the couch before my 12:45 yesterday and I noticed a moth on the wall near me. I thought nothing of it. He's welcome to chill there. But then when I came home after my lab at like 8:00 he was still in the exact same spot. I don't mind moths but I hate lazy moths. So I decided to capture him.

I put a cup on the wall, tapped him into it and then placed a coaster over the opening. Then I had a flash of evil genius. I decided to set up a Bond-esque death trap. I opened the lid just enough to allow a drop of water through it and placed it under the faucet. It was dripping slow enough to allow him time to escape, but he was going to have to time it just right. He waited until the last possible moment, the water was encroaching his wings, and then made a break for it. I attempted to squash him but he got away, so I let him go. Owen, Marshall, and I were enthralled. Okay, I was, but they also watched. Then Marshall took me to the mall and bought me some chinese food and ice cream. Rad!

In other news, my brother found out that his unborn baby is a girl. I tried to help him out and give some good suggestions for names. They were thinking about Kaylynn Elizabeth. I figured since she is going to be my brother's daughter, that she's already gonna be the whitest little girl on the planet. It might be a good idea to spice her up a little with an ethnic moniker. My suggestions were:
1. Reshawnda
2. Wei Le (but we would call her Jenny)
3. Consuala
I like them all but I think Consuala might be my favorite. And as an added bonus, it might help her get scholarships later. You never knows. Tonight Thommi and I are going to see some Russian chick play piano with the Russian symphony orchestra. I'll let you you all know how that goes. Peace.

I'm still not feeling well, which I am using as my excuse for the sparse updates as of late. In fact, I'm feeling so crappy that I didn't even go out last night. The last time I didn't go out on a Thursday was because I had an exam at 8am on Friday ... which, btw, I just got back today and I made a strong A on it. Boo yah. Going to class is overrated.

I am talking to Jellienuts right now about several things. One of which being his webpage coming back online. That's very exciting for me, and I'm sure you'll all agree once he unveils the new creation. I'll keep you posted. I also must congratulate our dear friend Jellienuts on his graduation from puppet school. Today was his last day of puppet school ever. Congrats! We also had a lengthy conversation concerning the Food Network and a a couple other cable shows. He said judging from my blog he would guess that I don't watch a lot of TV, but I want to assure you all, that I do, indeed, watch many, many hours a day.

Next order of business ... if you're looking to collect on my freelance photography opporitunity you had better hurry. Sean informed me today that he is in possession of a digital picture of the young padawan. He apparently rides the same bus as Sean, and he was sneaky in snapping a picture of him with his picture phone. He still has to find a way to download the picture so he can send it to me, but once he does, that chance for fast cash will be gone, and it'll be down to cape girl. Just food for thought.

Lastly, I went to the third annual Diversity Symposium last night. It was pretty cool, but not as good as last year (see Friday, November 22, 2002). Of course, there were no celebrities from Real World, so it was as good as you can expect. We did get to listen to the new director of diversity at A&M speak. That was cool. Keith met up with me to go to the symposium and had some good points about it. He felt like everyone was really pussy footing around the issues. In an attempt to be sensitive to all people, they kind of missed the problems all together. I dunno, I think its still a step in the right direction. Anything that is the opposite of what the Young Conservatives of Texas would do is A-OK with me. I hate those fucks. </irony>

I woke up yesterday feeling like absolute crap. I haven't felt like a dozen roses in a while, but this time it was especially bad. I tried to take a shower and get dressed, but I had this nagging feeling that I wasn't going anywhere. I took my temperature with the thermometer that Chris bought for me, and it registered a whopping 100.5. My nominal temperature is usually around 96, a little lower than most people, which sucks because Beautal will never acknowledge that I am running a fever. But this time, they couldn't deny it. So I decided I would go in and see if maybe they could tell me accurately this time what I've got.

I had the best doctor I've ever had at the Health Center. He was so cool. He actually looked at me, did a throat culture, spent a little time with me. The last time I went the lady didn't look or touch me, just asked my symptoms and said 'its probably strep here's some penicillin.' Well that didnt' really help. Now the guy said I still have strep, but that I've contracted the flu on top of it. So he prescribed me something for the strep, and something for the flu ... since one is bacterial and the other is viral. Then he told me to alternate between tylenol and advil every 3 hours.

Then we got to talking about drugs. I asked him for some hydrocodone and he laughed and called me a drug addict and then said 'you seriously want some? do you think you need it?' And I was like 'hmmm well its just that my throat hurts so bad.' And he was like 'well if you want it, you can have it, but i think what you really want is some cough syrup with codeine in it ... how have you been sleeping?' to which I replied, 'not well at all.' So he hands me a prescription for phenergin, which I had last April when I was having problems eating and sleeping. He prescribed it to me solely for the side effects. I have so many jars of pills that i want to buy one of those old people pill organizers.

And here just a while ago I was arguing that everyone gets the good prescriptions and I never get jack shit. I know who my new physician is. The only downside is that I have been completely out of it for the past 24 hours. When I do manage to wake up from my drug induced haze, I can barely function beyond laying on the couch. The only reason I am reaching out to now is that I just woke up from sleeping 14 hours last night, so my mind is the slightest bit clear. I'm about to go eat a handful of pills again though, so I'll catch you all the next time I come down.

"The most common symptoms of a strep throat infection are sudden, severe sore throat; pain or difficulty swallowing; fever over 101°F (38.33°C); swollen tonsils and lymph nodes and white or yellow spots on the back of a bright red throat."
-- www.webmd.com

I thought I would let WebMD tell you about my morning and spare you any gory details. I couldn't sleep at all last night, which I attributed to my sleep sched becoming a tad wonky from the weekend, but it turns out, I was just pitching a fever fervor. I finally gave up trying to sleep around 6am, a solid 4 hours after I'd retired. I thought I might go to my 8 oclock and go about my day, but instead ventured to the health center.

I was there for like 4 hours even though I only saw a doctor for a good 30 seconds. She decided it was probably strep and subscribed me some Penicillin. She didn't exactly instill a large amount of confidence in her hippocratic intentions, but if there's one thing I do trust, it's pills. So hopefully I'll be on the up and up soon.

In the meantime, my offer is still on the table for anyone that wants/needs strep throat. It can have its benefits including, but not limited to, sympathy from friends, prescriptions to drugs, and excuses from tests. Think about it. If you decide this is for you, contact me and we will make out.

Hey guys! Thanks so much for all of your sympathetic comments towards my illness! *makes masturbatorial motion* I'm sure you were all secretly concerned. Anyhowdy, I'm back to feeling well, and I'm sure I'll feel absolutely stellar tomorrow cause my neighbor, Brianne, lent me her humidifier. I'm sure its a bit over the top, but fuck it! Free humidity!

So I must say HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO COLETTE! She is the big two-two this fine morning. If you would like to extend her a big old Sidesho-Birthday Greeting, please aclick here. That would be cool of you, and only takes a moment.

One final note before I scurry to bed. GO SEE JACKASS the movie. OH MY GOD, I have never laughed so hard at so many moments before. Holy shit, its hilarious. If you've seen it, please, please post your reaction on this comment page. That would be stellar. Love you buh bye.

I'd have to say that everything about yesterday sucked. There was nothing good about it. Not one thing. I woke up around 9:00. I don't want to go into too much detail or get too graphic, but lets just say that my body was trying to expel fluids as rapidly as possible. There are 3 ways for your body to do this, and mine was doing all 3 at once. This continued all damn day. For the first 9 hours or so I couldn't so much as take a sip of water without violently dry heaving it back up. At one point I passed out in the bathroom cause I was so hungry and dehydrated and throwing up took a whole lot out of me. I was in bed for a total of 27 hours. I just woke up and I think I'm feeling better. You should see these darkass circles around my eyes, its kind of scary. But really I haven't eaten anything in about 40 hours. I might give that a try soon. Hopefully it will stay down.

Thats why I didn't update in a timely fashion. I was busy with other more important things. But I do have stories from Friday night. I went to a party at Arash's place with Ryan and Brandon. It was like a Halloween party. It was really fun. But thats not the story I'm telling. A few of us were out on the porch and I hear this truck completely revving the engine, so I look and I think to myself, "Damn, that truck is going REALLY fast." I'm not a good judge of this, but I'd say it was doing at least 40mph thru the parking lot. Next thing you know, this truck has jumped a curb and run into a parked car full speed. It not only destroys one car, but nails it into a second car which also gets fucked up. It was so crazy. Doesn't end there though. This truck throws it into reverse and PEELS out of there and they are gone. It was a frickin DWI hit and run. I'm not sure if anyone got the license number, but I hope so. Those guys are bastards. It really broke up the party too, which sucked. Since the cops were obviously going to be there soon and there was all sorts of underage drinking going on, everyone just kinda meandered home. I took Brandon home cause he was going to Austin for an early appointment, and then I went back to the party for a while. Believe it or not, I didn't drink the whole night, so those of you who would blame my stomach flu on a hangover are dead wrong. I wish I had drank though, maybe it would have killed whatever disease was floating around in my body. Thats the update for tonight. I will talk to you have nots later.

Guess who's back. Back again. Sidesho's back. Tell a friend. Yes, my friends, I am back in the pink today. Finally. Damn those 24 hour hangovers. Although, I have to admit a rather embarassing fact. This story is graphic, and not intended for my younger viewers. So I woke up at like noon yesterday and decided while I was feeling pretty good to get a little bit of lunch in my stomach and then go back to bed. And I made Hamburger Helper the night before, but I had failed to refrigerate the shit overnight. But I didn't think it would be a problem ... but now I think that was a really bad idea. Cause I laid in bed all day feeling like I needed to throw up, but didn't think that would be a good idea since all the alcohol was already out of my system, and I'd just forced myself to eat a big lunch and it would be a waste if i threw it up. So FINALLY around 6pm, I decided to just throw up, so that I would at least not feel queasy anymore. So I did it, and then cleaned my mouth, and stood up ... and INSTANTLY started feeling better. After that, I felt just fine. So now I'm equating the length and severity of my sickness, not to the alcohol, but to the rotten Hamburger Helper. So the moral of this story is ... refrigerate your leftovers, and if you happen to forget ... just don't eat the shit. A friendly PSA from yours truly.

Today I am going to go eat lunch around 2:00-2:30ish, because I have this thing to go to at 3. My symphony class professor is the conductor of the Brazos Valley Symphony Orchestra. And since we have to write a paper over two live performances this semester, I figured this would be as good an opportunity as any other. And he's hosting a talk today at 3 to talk to people about what we're going to hear at the concert tomorrow, i.e. everything I need for my paper. I'll still go to the concert, and not just because I paid $30 for tickets so I wouldn't have to go alone. Keith is going to go with me. But also because I genuinely enjoy music and I'm open to listening to music that I normally wouldn't listen to. So hopefully this will be an enriching experience. Plus I can describe music now using obnoxious music terms like basso continuo, and ritonello. Its fun to be pretentious. Then I think I might go to the mall and do some window shopping and say hi to my friend Stev-o who's gonna be working there today. We'll see. It depends on how long this symphony talk lasts, and how tired I feel after leaving the house. Since I haven't done that in a while. Alrighty then, I'll talk you kids later. Have a good one.