In the grand Sidesho tradition of immensely time consuming projects I will never finish sprinkled with a light dusting of masochism, I have decided to pluck my beard.

It's an idea that I've toyed with for about a decade now but have never made any significant attempt to complete. It started out this time as an attempt to clean up my lower lip where my dark red beard becomes outlined by hundreds of translucent blonde baby hairs. It was too hard to get a razor in there without risking irrepairably damaging my beard, so I just plucked them. And then I cleaned up all the edges. And then extended them down a little so I'd have a good line down to my jaw. And then I realized weeks later that the skin was still completely smooth.

So I thought, why not keep going. I've decided to do 30 hairs a night. 10 from the mustache, 20 from elsewhere. All while trying to keep it as even as possible. Judging by estimates on the internet, this should take me around 150 days to accomplish. And I'll have to keep up maintenance as I go. The pain is moderate at best. My biggest fear is doing damage to my face with ingrown hairs and whatnot, and permanently debilitating my ability to grow facial hair. That, and once I get down toward the end, will I just have a scraggly nasty prepubescent stache?

Anyway, this'll probably fizzle out after about a week, I'll shave like normal, and my hair will grow back like normal a couple cycles later and that will be that. But I thought it worth mentioning. Has anybody else ever tried anything like this? Is it insanity ... or is it brilliant?