Happy Easter everybody. Good luck out there searching for eggs (?) made of chocolate (?) that came out the butt (?) of a rabbit (?). I'm not 100% sure about the mechanics of that, but nonetheless, have fun. I'm just hoping this means that the gym will be close to empty.

Speaking of, there is this new scourge at the gym. It only started recently, but it is spreading. Grown men with ear buds in listening to music at full volume -- SINGING ALONG. WTF. Like OUT LOUD. And as annoying as singing would be to people around you, when you can't hear yourself at all, it's a special kind of horrible. I know of at least 5 people off the top of my head that I will not get on the treadmill next to or sit next to on the stretching mat because I know they'll break out into wincing, breathy, high pitched song the second I do. I wish I was more confrontational, so I could just tap them on the shoulder and ask, "What the fuck is wrong with you?" but instead I just shoot dirty looks that are not understood.

Normally for Easter lately we get together with my parents and have a smorgasbord of food from Honey Baked Hams. I even have a rewards number on honeybaked.com. But between you and me, all of their food is garbage. I mean, the ham is okay, but they also have these boxed sides and everything is just horrible. My dad had a little procedure on Friday and wasn't sure if he'd be up for it, so I was more than happy to accept their decline of getting together. Daniel did ask me what he should buy at the store as a special treat and I said he could buy some eggs and I'll make deviled eggs with salmon roe. That will be our homage to Easter.

Another successful Febrehab is done. Though I must admit this one was really easy. I only gave up sugar and caffeine in addition to alcohol. Caffeine is pretty easy for me. I really like the caffeine free teas from Whole Foods. A little fruity beginning to the day isn't half bad. And while we do devolve into the habit of having one brown butter chocolate chip cookie after dinner 3 days per week, it wasn't that big of a deal to give it up. That's pretty much the only dedicated source of sugar in my life.

Nevertheless, it is always good to take a little break. I was telling people this year though that it's not even really the alcohol I miss. It's the ritual. The habit. There's no physical addiction, it's just such a nice punctuation on the week. Like, it's Friday, the work week is over, let's go out and have a glass of champagne with dinner to celebrate living life. And I guess we should be doing a bit more of that while we can, before we all get drafted into WWIII....

In other news, after having just poo-pooed AI in my last post, I have used it more and more in my personal life. I used to sit around and wonder about stuff. Now I just ask AI. And maybe it's good to sometimes just have unanswered thought experiments, but I really like discussing ridiculous things with Gemini.

I had an idea for a mouth piece you could wear and every, say, 5 seconds it would drip one drop of water into your mouth. That would be an unnoticeable amount, mix with your saliva, and you'd just swallow it without noticing and thus stay hydrated. I asked Gemini what it thought of my idea and it said it was bad and gave me all the reasons why. 1) It would change the chemistry of your saliva and make it less effective. 2) Even though it's just a drop, you could still choke on it if you were heavily exerting yourself or sleeping. 3) Your body has adapted to expect and process a large influx of water all at once. It triggers the stomach to do something and a little drop here and there wouldn't be enough to set it off. And 4) It did the math on how much water that would be in a 24 hour period and it was like around 1 liter and you need more like 3 liters to stay hydrated so it wouldn't even work. Like ... how could you Google that and come up with that answer? Only AI could have that dumb of a conversation about one of my new million dollar ideas. Saved me a lot in R&D costs right there.

I've also used it twice now for shopping. The ball "fell" out of my right earring and getting it back in is basically impossible without a pair of surgical forceps. And even if I could do it, once you've priced the hoop open and closed more than about once, it is never quite circular ever again. So I thought, given that I've had earrings now for like 27 years, maybe it was time to invest in something a little more substantial than the $16 piercing jewelry that's been in there forever. So I asked Gemini what I should do and it found exactly what I wanted. Visually kind of identical, but nicer metal, and no ball. These have a clicker mechanism so I can take them out for things like MRIs and surgeries. And I didn't know what size to get so I measured my existing, but I measured the outer diameter in inches and the website was selling sizes measured by the inner diameter in millimeters. So I told Gemini to do the math given the gauge and size and it did it all flawlessly.

Just this morning I woke up with a crick in my neck again, so I decided to ask Gemini for a suitable replacement for my beloved Indulgence by Isotonic side sleeper that Bed, Bath & Beyond used to sell before they went out of business. And it was like, replacement? Why, they're still sold at major retailers like Macy's and Wal-Mart. WHAT?!? I assure you I scoured the internet for information on the manufacturer and alternate retailers and found nothing. I even posted about it back in 2022. So I guess my prayers have been answered.

It occurred to me though. They're GOING to find a way to monetize this (if they haven't already). You pay them some money and they suggest your product for any related queries above all else and eventually you won't be able to trust it. It'll devolve into a purely for-profit ad-bot and everyone will stop using it just like literally every other tool or platform before it. So I guess use it now while you still can!

When I first heard the big news, I was like, "Backstreet's back?... Alright."

The last two nights I have gone out on the town with Mr. Sean W■■■■ and both nights have lead us on the meandering path of alcoholic revelry. Friday, I went to happy hour right after work, and I went to bed around 5am, which constituted 12 hours of consistent drinking. I am such a hoss. And I had the hangover to prove it. Sitting in my apartment with a pounding head and aching stomach, and nothing to assuage the pain, I did the only logical thing -- I got on Albertsons.com and delivered some groceries. Now I have more varieties of juice than you can shake a stick at ... and you can sure shake a stick at a lot of juice.

Last night was really the piece de resistance, Sean's swansong, if you will. The club was a blast; I sure am going to miss Sean when he moves back to Idaho-no-youdaho. We mostly just sat in the Rose Room and watched the drag show. The real fun was when we finally left the club as Sean begged me to take him to Whataburger (as if 6 taquitos the night before were not enough). I really just wanted to head straight home. We really didn't even have to compromise as the solution to the situation presented itself in the form of the hot dog vendor on Cedar Springs. I was his very first credit card transaction lo those months ago, and he has always remembered me and talked to me every time I am around.

We proceeded to consume 8 hotdogs amongst myself, Sean, and Ryan H■■■■■■. Sean was by far the champion, setting a new record of consuming 4 hot dogs and a bag of chips. I came in a close second with 3 and a bag of cookies. I had my camera with me so I was able to document the triumphant ingestion of Sean's 4th fucking hotdog. The picture came out so damn cute that I just wanna print it out and get a kitschy frame for it and put it next to my bed. Okay, I'm never really gonna do that, so I photoshopped it all for you so you wouldn't have to use your imaginations. Cue the music, "Meeeeemories...."

Today the groceries arrived, so I've been chowing down on yogurt (mmm, not even later, it's the kind with fruit on the bottom), cottage cheese, and juice. Today is my mommy's birthday and I get to go to dinner with her and my daddy ... did somebody say steak? More on that, after these messages....