I just got back from a week in San Antonio. I was there to take a training class for work. It was from 8-5 every day in the hotel I was staying at next to the airport. Needless to say I was bored out of my gourd. I took this picture as I was checking out of my hotel room because I thought it rather succinctly summed up my entire trip. People in my training course were kind of laughing at me because I was eating each night at places like Papadeaux's and Applebee's. They thought I should get out and experience the local fare. But I was just like, c'mon, I'm from Dallas. It's not like San Antonio is a foreign country. If I managed to find something uniquely San Antonio it would just be a hole-in-the-wall Mexican place with meat, cheese, and tortillas combined in a variety of ways. So I opted to eat at places I liked, albethem chain restaurants, because it was free. And that made it special.

So I made it through the week with little incident. Last night Daniel and I went with JennyCole to see the new Sex and the City movie. It was fantastic. If you haven't seen it yet, you definitely should. We went to the Studio Movie Grill to watch it so we could get loaded at the same time. But ultimately, the same thing happened to me that always happens there. I end up having to pee so bad by the time the movie's over that I have a hard time sitting still. But I made it through. There was one thing about the movie that pissed me off. And it's not a spoiler, but if you don't want to know anything about the movie don't read this next part. So Charlotte adopted that little Chinese girl, right? And what did she name her? Lily. How many times have I said that I'm adopting a little Asian girl and naming her Lily because I want violin music while I eat? But I also always said that if I had another little girl, I would name her Rose. Not so much because of the obvious floral reference, but because I like the really old-timey names. Okay, so Charlottle has a baby and they name it Rose. So now if I ever by some fluke of nature have two daughters, and name them Lily and Rose, people will be like, oh yeah from Sex and the City. And that will piss me off. So I'm having my tubes tied.

In other news, the Allistralian came back to the states for a visit. She is leaving Australia soon and convinced me that it's now or never if I want to go visit her. So Daniel and I are going to Australia. For REAL this time. No joke. It'll probably be somewhere in the August range. It's gonna be a pretty baller ass vacation, but that's okay because those are the kinds of vacations we need to be taking. I'll keep you all posted on details of that. If anyone would like to go with, the more people we have the easier that 12 hour flight will be. Lemme know. Peace out.

I always tease Daniel about date night because the entire concept is so ridiculous and reserved only for married couples in strained relationships who really don't like being around each other, but once a week go out together and get sauced up enough to copulate. So any time we go out to dinner or a movie I like to scream, "Date night!" But in all seriousness, tonight we had a date night. Dinner for two at Halfshells in Plano. We got a crab and shrimp and andoiulle sausage platter and a couple beers. Then we went to see August Rush. Srsly, go see it. Read my review to the right for more on that. It was just perfect. We should really try to do this once a week.

One more week and I'll be Vegas bound. I can't wait. Daniel really can't wait. The Vegas trip is to celebrate his graduation, which will also occur in one week. He's already finished with several of his classes and I just couldn't be more proud of him. He's kind of a big deal. It's going to be a hectic week for me and then I have like 10 days in a row away from work, and you'd better believe me, I'm going to forget alllll about it.

One last thing about August Rush and then I'm done. I really want my brother to go see it because on those late nights when we were up recording Brother Band songs, and he would man the guitar, he always played it like August does. Two hands on the neck of the guitar ... bangin' ... making beautiful music. Only his was a fraction of a second long and had to be looped in order to sound cool. But still, same effect. I'm heading off to lay on the couch some more, my home in my home. Czech you skillets on the flip side.

Friday night Daniel and I went to the movie theater on account of my surgery keeping me from being able to drink. Whenever I'm sober and I try to think of something to do, I always end up at the movie theater. It's just about the only wholesome activity I am aware exists.

As we were pulling up to the Valley View Mall, we were behind this ostentatious Mercedes-Benz SUV. It had a flatscreen TV at the front of the passenger cabin and one at the back. And instead of seats it had benches. The side of the truck had this huge picture of this old dude with Einstein hair and his signature and logo. It was none other than... drum roll... Peter Nygård! Holy shit!

If you're like me, then your reaction to that news was a little something like, "Who?" As we passed by Dillards we saw people running around with walkie-talkies and a crowd of people waiting. This was clearly where Peter was heading. We parked by the movie theater and then I ran over to Dillards because I was far too curious. I asked a guy with an earpiece who Peter Nygård was and he said he designs women's clothes that sell at Dillards. Well it just so happened that as I was getting this information, the same Mercedes-Benz monstrosity pulled up next to me.

About 6 hot hoochies stepped out first. Daniel was pulling me toward the theater so we could get seats but I told him to wait because I really wanted to clap for Peter Nygård. So this old guy steps out and I started clapping wildly, trying to get everyone around me started as well. It didn't work. And I didn't stop.

I was clearly on drugs.

Then we went to see the new James Bond flick, Casino Royale. Read my review. It was so awesome. I want you all to go see it today.

If you haven't ever seen Dave Chapelle's Block Party, I suggest you go rent it immediately and bask in it. Just bask. I rented it last night when Blockbuster didn't have Stangers with Candy (so lame). So now I'm sitting home alone with a bottle of Patrón chilling in the freezer thoroughly enjoying myself. I got dressed up for no reason, fried some dinner in butter and life is good.

I remember the first time I saw Block Party. It was when the ever lovely Miss Lesbie Ann Bizzell was in my hizzell and we wanted a drizzell in the mornizzle, like you do. After drinking breakfast at the Gecko we went to Studio Movie Grill and laughed our asses off at this movie in between martinays. Loves it.

On Monday I have to get up at 4am. I have a 6am flight to Manassas, VA. Well, there's no airport in Manassas, obviously, but it is right near Washingtown, DC. I have to be there for a week with work. I would be lying if I didn't say I was looking forward to it. I've gotten in a rut lately, if you haven't noticed. I hardly ever leave my apartment. I never go anywhere or do anything. That is one downfall to dating. You just get comfortable and stop trying to look around for fun things to do. So now I'm going to Manassas. If I weren't dating Daniel then I'd say I looked forward to getting some asses in Manassas, but it's just a tag line now.

I got my sister's name in our annual xmas gift exchange. She's a 30-something news anchor, soon-to-be-mother of two with a brand new house. Give me gift ideas. I am not having any ideas pop into my head.

Like I said, not too many hilarious stories to tell from the couch unless you want me to recount my favorite episodes of Family Guy.... No? Then FUCK YOU. I'm out. Peace.

I finally finished painting my bedroom. I have never been so proud of myself for anything in my life. I think it looks so good, almost like an adult, put together bedroom. My bed floats in the middle of the room now. I still need a new end table, new lamps, new bed frame, new table, and new curtains, but the biggest portion of the work is done. It was really hard for me to get one good picture that showed it off, so I took a few. The fourth one is to show you that I did, indeed, repaint my router to match.

I also cut all my hair off and I'm growing a beard. This is a life makeover. Now if I could just stop chain smoking and skipping the gym. I was doing so well for a while there. I'll get back on it soon. I fell off of my diet somewhat due to my trip to Houston for Memorial Day weekend. It was totally worth it though. I went to visit my brother and help out with his impregnito wife and baby daughter. Kaylyn is the cutest thing, and now that she can talk, she is funny too. It was really nice to get to know her, and have her know who I am. About every 5 minutes she would ask, "Where's Uncle David?" if I wasn't in her immediate view. She'll be 2 in July. I can't believe she's getting so big so fast.

I also got to see Kevin. We drank a lot and played darts. I ended up losing after coming from way behind to take the lead. That g*d damn bullseye. I could not hit it. The rest of the nights I hung out with my brother. We saw X3. I thoroughly enjoyed it, although it wasn't the best X-Men movie, I didn't think. Still worth seeing though. One night we went to this place called Whiskey River. It was a totally open up barn type building with this wasted, barefoot guy playing guitar on stage. When we walked in he was berrating some paying customers that had asked him to please stop yelling and cussing into the microphone. It sent him into a tirade about being in the service industry. This guy was so bad, I can hardly explain it. His guitar was so out of tune that my brother noticed it. That's pretty bad.

There are a few distinct stereotypical guitar players. There's the "plays Dave at college parties" guitar player. There's the "pseudo lesbian Ani-wanna-be" guitar player. There's the "stuck-in-the-80s all I wanna do is wail ARE YOU READY TO ROOOOCK YOW!" guitar player. There's the "classically trained and snooty as hell because of it" guitar player. I like to consider myself a "only knows 3 songs and plays them repeatedly" guitar player. If you can think of any more, please feel free to share. Anyway, after one second of looking at the entertainment for the night, I remarked to my brother, "This guy LOVES Pearl Jam, I guarantee it." So we started yelling for him to play some Pearl Jam. The only song we could think of was Jeremy. He told us that he would play Jeremy because it was a great song, but never fucking did. He did, however, play some Pearl Jam, and as you would expect, he did it in his best Eddie Vetter impression voice. So fucking lame. When we left, my brother held down the horn from the time we got in the car until we left the parking lot to interrupt his show. Too damn funny.

I think that's all the news to report. Leave me some comments on how I have the best fucking bedroom in the world. Thaaaaaaaanks.

It's great to be back. I gotta tell you. Boy, I missed beer. And liquor. Liquor? I hardly even know her. My glorious return to drinking was shared with a couple of birthdays. First, to the Allistralian. She flew halfway around the world and I had to fuckin miss her bbq. I was stuck in Funkytown until like 7:30pm for work, and then by the time I arrived back at the office, I already had some friends from out of town waiting for me. So my apologies, but I do hope you had the best birthday ever.

Next, was Miss Lesbie Ann. She drove up from Austin to celebrate turning into 27. Oh wait, I mean, turning 27, my mistake. She had been to Dallas plenty of times, but she had never been to Addison! I assumed I would have to show her all that Addison! had to offer, but instead, she showed me ....

Friday night we sat around drinkin beers like I do most weekends. I wanted her to meet everyone and see how we do. Saturday morning we woke up and went to Cafe Gecko for Bloody Marys and breakfast (since when are those different things). From there, we went and bought tickets for Dave Chappelle's Block Party. Really, we just wanted to drink more and figured a movie without a solid plot might allow for breaks to the bathroom. A few margaritas and martinis later we retired for a respite in my apartment until it was time for our appointments at the spa. Unfortunately, they couldn't find anyone to massage me on such short notice, but Lester did have a diamond scrub facial with allllll the trimmings. I met her at Zen Bar to celebrate and we threw back a few brewskis, brah. Then we met up with Daniel to go to Shuck and Jive where we ate more oysters than you would normally assume three people would eat and drank a lot more brews, dude. Our plans to get fancied up and go south of 635 were interrupted by our inability to drive. So we wrapped up the evening drinking at Daniel's until we both passed out. What a fabulous weekend. Thank you so much to my host, Leslie!

Last bit of business. Who watched Project Runway? Who else is incensed at the finale? Chloe?!?! Give me a fucking break. Her collection was a bunch of shiny GEM monstrocities. I thought they were going to tear her a new one. I was a Dan Fan through the whole season but had just recently switched to voting for Santino. I wasn't blown away by any one collection, but I thought that Santino would win. Daniel's was too plain Jane store shelf looking. I don't wanna look at anything too conceptual but I also don't want to look at something I probably could have thought of. Blech, what a disappointment. I can't wait until Jay McCarroll's line comes out. I'm gonna wear the shit out of it.

This weekend. Out of town. Niece's 1st birthday in OKC. Can't wait. See you all when I get back.

Have you seen this Colgate commercial? They're implying that if your gums bleed a little bit when you brush that it could be a sign of gingivitis and that brushing with Colgate will fix that. But what gets me every time is the chick who says "When I saw a little pink in the sink...." You cannot tell me I'm the only one who hears "two in the pink, one in the stink" and looks up expecting to see the shocker.

I have a new goal. Well, actually, it's an old goal, but I'm going to go for it now. I want to own everything as seen on TV. I'm talking everything. I'm going to begin with the Faraday Flashlight. It's a flashlight that charges itself based on the electromagnetic principles discovered by English chemist and physicist Michael Faraday. I'm really impressed they named it after him too. I also like that you have to shake it in a masturbatorial motion in order to get it to work.

How was Vegas? Oh, I'm glad you asked. I won about 700 bucks. Yay! Unfortunately, I lost about 850. It was pretty fun though. I hit a couple of big pots on the slots. I was just in such a mood for slots. You know how it is, when you get all slotty, put on your slottiest outfit. I got to see the Allistralian! She is back in the contiguous United States. We were in Vegas together for her last night and my first night. Good times. I need to call her now that she's in Dallas. The rest of my trip was resignation fodder, but the odds of that blossoming beyond an idle threat are small. I used to have ambition. Sigh.

I don't have to work tomorrow. Rawk! Oh, I almost forgot it was still Febrehabruarii and I have to comment on it. I didn't crack whilst in Sin City. It was a huuuuuge challenge, but no problemo for yours truly. I've been having a lot of sober fun with my fellow rehabruaers, Daniel and Brett Sabulous. Oh, and in closing, let me just save you all 8 bucks -- do NOT go see Date Movie. Laaaaaaaaaate.

Two weeks later, I have finally arrived back home. Getting from Cincinnati to Austin was an ordeal. It took right around 12 hours total. First my plane from Cincinnati to Chicago was delayed by the hurricane. When it finally arrived, we were delayed by a problem at O'Hare. By the time I got to Chicago, my connecting flight was long gone. My new flight was then canceled and I ended up getting to Austin-Bergstrom at 1am. A long cab ride later I was finally at Leslie's.

Leslie's apt was low-key and fun. We sat around drinkin' wine and brewskis and watching Food Network and Napoleon Dynamite. Leslie just bought a house! Yay! Her housewarming party should be sometime around October and I cannot wait. We drove by the house and it is too cute. Even though the street name is dirrty.

I drove back to Dallas today and finally got to see my buddy, Tuna. I'm a little disconcerted by the fact that he no longer has a tail fin. I'm not sure what happened there, but he is a uniplegic now. Poor guy. He is not in a good mood. Thanks to Mr. Kenderdine for taking such doting care of my fish.

I went and had coffee with Mikey since he's staying up in Plano while he interviews here in Dallas. Good times, good times. Alright, I gotta go to bed, but I wanted to let you all know that I made it back alive. I'm not really looking forward to returning to work tomorrow, but I'm going to the sleep clinic tomorrow night, so I have something to look forward to. Here's to my last night of apnea ridden sleep. Huzzah!

There is a new name for my 'new' hair-do. It's called the breeze. Ryan Short and I came up with it because it appears as though an invisible breeze is constantly blowing from the right. I'm a big fan of the breeze and plan to take it to extremes that rival my fox hawk experimentation. Tonight I went to a barbeque at Eddie's house with a bunch of peeps. It was decided that I have to crimp my hair. This guy said he would buy me a crimper if I would go out with my hair crimped. I'm going to see if I can get that started. How fucking funny would that be? Very.

I do need to make an appt to have my hair cut before AllieD's wedding. I'm thinking of going platinum, but I'm not entirely sure. I may let Xristofer have the final say since I'm always so damn happy with the results, but I am kind of tired of the dark. I can hide the fact that my blonde hair has grown out blonde highlights, but it's a little bit more obvious with the dark. All I know is that I want it to be so much longer than it is and I am convinced that it has stopped growing. Patience has never been my #1 virtue.

Had a pretty good weekend. Met lots of new neighbors that could be pretty fun. Drank lots and lots of beer. Watched Mr. and Mrs. Smith with no sound (review to follow). All in all, not too shabby. Tomorrow I go to the doctor to get my apnea fixed. I cannot wait. Plus, I'll leave work early. Hurrah!

I was just talking to Allistralian and I remembered a story I totally forgot to tell you all. I was sitting in a hotel room in Oshkosh, WI watching TV with my mom, my brother-in-law Bryan, and sister-in-law Krouton. There was nothing particularly good on (except the old school Saturday Night Live hosted by Pee Wee Hermann with musical guest some-crappy-zydeco-band) so we were flipping. As my mom breezed by TLC, I saw the logo for Sheer Dallas and made her stop.

As I explained the premise of the show, they announced that the stylists were going to pair up for a big hair contest. It was a radio announcement I knew all too well, since I was in Pompeo, the salon, when it happened. I mentioned that this was where I got my hair done, although I refused to tell my mother just how much my haircut had actually cost. About halfway through the show, I said, "Hey, there's Xristopher, my stylist!" And a few seconds later ... you guessed it! ... BAM, a full head shot of yours truly. I was on TLC for 3 glorious seconds, sitting in a chair with a head full of foil. It was one of the proudest moments of my life. If anybody else happened to witness the blessed event, do be sure to let me know.

Next order of business, I went and saw Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith tonight. I was gonna put it on my movie reviews, but I thought it was deserving of blog status. This movie was so badass. If you're a Star Wars fan at all, you're going to love it. If not, you'll still probably love it. There were so many badass elements to it, but my favorite was at the end. Before you whine and bitch, we all know what happens at the end, so I'm not ruining the movie. That'd be like me telling you the Titanic sinks. But when Darth Vader walks into the ship with the Emperor, they made it look exactly like Episode IV. They didn't revamp it at all. All the computers had ridiculously large, square LEDs that serve no purpose and all the dudes in there were wearing the old skool military uniforms. Love it. Go see it and let me know what you think.

To tie it all together, I think on my next haircut, scheduled for sometime in late June, I might go towards the dark side.

BUM BUM BUM BUMBA DUM BUMBA DUM

HAPPY SOLSTICE!!!!!1! Today it was 70 degrees and the forecast for tomorrow is snow.

Here are some things I've probably told all you at one time or another, but I need to get them out there, because it will make future blogs easier to write.

First, I am giving up drinking for an entire month. I have selected February as my dry month, for the obvious reason that it is the shortest month and I'm concerned that this will be next to impossible for me. There are several reasons that I am doing this. The first of which is that I'm concerned that this wil be next to impossible for me. It's that whole, "I can quit anytime," mentality that gets people into trouble. So I want to make sure I can still quit anytime. I have also been disturbingly unproductive since I moved here. I need to finish decorating and painting and everything. But the biggest reason is that I need money. I am going to see Allison is Australia in July and one alcohol free month will pay for the entire thing. Yeah, its that out of hand.

The fun thing is, February is 28 days long. So I am going recreate Sandra Bullocks commanding performance in 28 Days (not to be confused with its sequel, 28 Days Later).

In foreign news, I might get to go to Sweden for two weeks for work. I don't care if they make me do fucking manual labor in Sweden, it will fucking rawk. It's not certain in the least that I will get to go but I really, really, really hope I do. I've been pretty pushy about it at work, vying for the opportunity.

Lastly, I am never cutting my hair again. Never. Every day that I don't cut my hair, I am happier than the day before. This counteracts the fact that every day that I go to work is worse than the day before. So I am flatlined right now.

I think that's all that I had to report. I've had about 15 conversations during the time that I was typing this so I got a little sidetracked. Time to go to the gym for a cardio day. Whoo hoo. Later, sluts.

Do you ever just have too much to say? So much so that you don't feel like writing it down. That's what happened to me this past weekend. I decided to just sit on my stories for a while, so details that once seemed monumental are now rather trivial. It will make my blog shorter, and the stories more compact.

First things first. My brothers Stephen and Michael, from Houston and Sacramento, respectively, both visited. Their wives came as well. Stephen brought Kaylyn around so Michael could meet her, to avoid having to introduce himself to her on her 13th birthday. I just loved this picture. I assure you, she was well nutured and attended to all weekend, but this picture is so something my fam would do. 'Ahh, just prop her up, she'll be alright.' It was cute though. It was really good to see everyone that came to dinner on Friday night. I supplied the dessert -- peach cobbler from Marshall's BBQ. Oh man, is it ever good. I made everyone try it, even if they didn't want to. I also passed around my shock lighter. That was some good entertainment there. By the end of the night, we had 11 people around the table holding hands, while Stephen and I grabbed the lighter simultaneously. Everyone around the circle felt the shock. It was hilarious.

That night I went out to the bars, but wasn't really having much fun. Ryan Short and I decided to just go back to his place and go to sleep. When we got there, however, I coerced him into having one drink before bed. Which turned into two ... then three ... then we lost count. Much squeezy vodka was ingested despite Ryan's attempt to fall asleep. We watched Romy and Michele's High School Reunion, our favorite movie. Since the last time I saw it, I learned all the state capitals. So when they're at the reunion and Toby Dumbfuck asks them to name all the capitals and the Frinkazoid starts off with 'Albuquerque' I KNEW that was NOT the capital of New Mexico, because everyone knows that's Santa Fe. So we called everyone we knew to tell them that and even convinced Jason and Levi to come have a drink with us. We were beyond wasted, but obviously so much fun.

Saturday night I went out with Lil Jarrod. We had a blast. He is one of my new favs ... too funny. It was so damn crowded because this weekend was Pride. You could barely move and getting a drink was an impossibility. Ryan Short got fed up with the crowds and left unannounced, so our plan to stay at his place overnight was soon liquidated. Bob and his brother and friends were in the bars too. Too good to see him! We had fun all night long and then set about trying to decide where to go. Even though I had like three Long Islands and about six beers, I was feeling adventurous so we turned toward Plano. But I can't go home because my parents set a big wake-up-the-neighborhood alarm when they go to bed. So we eventually ended up in Lewisville at Lil Jarrod's apartment. I slept on his couch and hope I didn't scare his sister in the morning. I don't think I did though because she was quite lovely and it was nice to meet her.

From there we went back downtown to the Pride Parade. I'm sorry, but I love Pride. I don't care how many people are too cool for school. It is my favorite holy day, second only to Thanksgiving. I fought for beads as best I could, and even caught some, a feat not to be overlooked. I got some sun -- so hot, saw tons of people I knew, hung out with Lil Jarrod and Marc, got to go to Hamburger Mary's for the first time and meet some new people. All in all it was a wonderful day. I was sunburned and exhausted when I got home, and since then I have been in the most inane training class at work. It is downright painful. But, persevere I will.

This weekend I am going to College Station with Ryan Hudler. We are going to watch some ring dunkings. I'm not positive who it was but I wanna say Daniel. So I won't have my car but I will have my phone so call me and meet up with. Alright, sluts, I'm out of here. I gotta go work out because I'm morbidly obese. Peace!

This weekend I made yet another trip to beautiful College Station, Texas. There were good and bad things about my little vacation. Instead of dividing them into two categories I thought I would alternate between one good thing and then one bad thing to keep things all evened out. Starting with the good, naturally.

I got to leave work at 2:30 on Thursday because I had finished everything for the week, which means I got to take a Friday off for free! When I got to College Station, Marshall didn't want to go out and refused to even attempt to have fun. But AllieD was rarin' to go so we got all sloshed and had a rip roaring good time. The next morning I was completely hungover. So Allison and I went to see Napoleon Dynamite and it was really funny. That night I was ready to go crazy at the bar but got completely stood up by Marshall. Allison came to the rescue after I stopped by a party of hers and took her out to Halo. It was completely dead there. 27 showed up. I rounded out the evening back at the party fairly bored and not drunk enough. The next day I got see meet up and go out to lunch with Tommy. I was supposed to go see his new loft downtown when he got off work at 5, but despite knowing that he was home he refused to answer the phone and let me up and I haven't talked to him since. But he lives next door to a bar, so I spent that time drinking beer and talking to the hippies at Revolutions. I wanted to make a shirt like the one that Napoleon wore in the movie, but I ultimately couldn't find the right supplies. So I went back to Marshall's and took a nap. He never called me after he got off work, despite the fact that I put gas in his car that had been sitting empty on the side of the road for a couple of days. I had plans of my own, though, since Brian (Allison's fab friend) and his roommate James were having a party. I was still pretty hungover from my previous days' binging so I really couldn't drink a lot. And the highlight of the weekend, Chris came to the party.

End the pattern. Did everyone notice it alternated good and bad? (I color coded it after the fact.) I didn't even have to try, because the good and bad was chronological it turns out. But yeah, seeing Chris was really good. I miss that kid so much. It's a lot easier to forget that when I haven't seen him in 6 months, but seeing him again brings that all back. It was a good time though. Maybe I'll see him again in 7 years when he graduates from grad school. Raul and Rob accompanied us to the party. That's always a good time. Brian and James have the coolest friends. It was an excellent party. Other highlights included seeing Justin McK and Charlie at Halo, 27s friend being delightfully nice, and Texas Toothpicks. Other lowlights included not seeing Stino, 27s other friend being dreadfully rude, and Marshall leaving for "lunch" while I was still in bed on Sunday and then never ever coming home. I don't think I'll be going back to College Station for a while ... not without reason.

Tonight I went swimming. It felt so good. I realized I haven't been out of breath or felt my muscles burn in months! I felt just like Michael Phelps. Oh great, now everyone googling for pics of the speedo-clad Phelps are going to end up here. It probably won't help that I'm about to say gold medal Athens 2004 Olympics. (After typing this, I've decided to make tricking googlers into coming to my site a permanent feature on my site.)

Last business to discuss. September 3rd: ULDE:IYDKYDG. Ryan Short, Brent Wager, and I are throwing a party to celebrate a day of Labor Pains. That stands for Uptown Labor Day Extravaganza: If You Don't Know, You Don't Go. If you would like to come, leave a comment, and IM or an email giving me your email address and I'll make sure you get on the e-vite list. And with all the e-vite list theft going on around town, you'll probably be invited to several subsequent Dallas parties as well. I'm expecting some College Station folk to attend. Also, October 2nd: Stephen Lynch and Mitch Hedberg, the two funniest men alive, performing together at the Paramount in Austin. I'm buying tickets this Saturday so if you would like to go, let me know. Tickets are $35.

I hope you all have an alternatingly good and bad time this week. And remember ... if you don't know .. you don't go!

When I got home today, my heart skipped a beat. I walked into my room to find my beloved Tuna floating on top of the water. I don't talk about Tuna very much on my blog (he's my fish, for any newcomers) but I sure do love him. He is the most expressive fish I've ever met in my life. People think i'm being facetious when I talk about Tuna being mad at me, but it is so true. Usually when I get home, he sees me walk in the door and swims to the top to wait for me to come say hi to him. But if I happen to forget to feed him for one night, when I come in the next day, he'll swim down behind the faux plants and ignore me. He is so moody but he's the fucking coolest fish ever and I love him. So I come in to find him on top of the water, and I freeeeeeeak, but he doesn't look dead. So I inspect and find that he's pinned above the water on top of one of the plant's leaves, so I pushed him off. He is quite upset by it, and I wish I knew how long he'd been there. Whenever he gets really upset, his purple and black scales turn a pale white, and he's like all white now. Just a second ago he tried to jump out of the tank he's in. I have a suicidal fish just like Amelie.

I joke but if he were really to die, I would be more distraught than you would probably find rational over a pet betta. Hopefully it won't come to that for a few more years. Maybe I should get him some guppy friends. I just don't know.

Last night I had the opportunity to go out to dinner with Sean W. and Tom the Australian. We went out to On the Border and introduced Tom the Australian to margaritas. He approved, naturally. Then we watched Ellen Degeneres' stand up called Here and Now. Can't remember if I mentioned this stand up routine already, but I rented it randomly one day and proceeded to watch it like 3 times a night until it was due and then I bought it and kept on watching it. Even though I've seen it about 50 times, we laughed our asses off. It was so much funnier watching it with other people around to laugh with you. And Tom the Australian hadn't seen it yet so he had some fresh laughter to contribute. It was a really great time. Of course, I was out until about midnight, a new latest record.

So today I spent the day getting pi out to 250 digits, getting all the states and capitals down, taking a look at the square root of 2, and getting started on the presidents in order. I also got scared that some of this might be a waste of my time and brain capacity so I prepared an excel sheet to help me memorize all 120 or so phone numbers in my cell phone. As I was going through the list, many, many of you got deleted, but the rest of you will soon be backlogged in my brain for eternity. It's so good that they're paying me to stay busy. Ha! The beers and jaeger shots are telling me to go to sleep now, so I'll see you have nots later.

Damn, it's a nice day outside. 75 degrees and sunny. You couldn't ask for a nicer treat to hang over to on a Saturday. Although instead of enjoying the day, I'm sitting inside cleaning my room and watching Super Troopers. I'm about to go downstairs and heat up my extra taquito from Whataburger this morning. If there's anything better than taquitos, it's taquitos from 11am to 11pm, when regular people can't get one.

If any of you missed it on my away message the other night, [click here] to see a picture of me that I "vectored." Kevin's little sis, Laura, IMed me the other day to show me some pictures she'd done it to and then sent me the tutorial on how to do it. I think it's pretty rad and I am working on something along these lines to be the new SVC layout. We'll see.

Also, [click here] to see the baby announcement my brother made for Kaylyn. It is beyond cute. I can't wait to go down there and see her on Saturday. That's another reminder for all of you College Station peeps. I will be there Friday and Saturday night to party like it's 2003, so be prepared.

I hate working. I mean, while I'm there, it's not so bad. Sometimes the hours absolutely drag by and sometimes I'm done before I realized it was getting close to quittin' time. I have another piece of flair the Nazi's make me wear. This one's a cell phone. My whole life I have hated cell phones clipped to belts more than I hate Jessica Simpson (and her little sister now too). But, in keeping with the theme of turning myself into all the things I've always despised, I wear it obligingly. It's way too big to keep in my pocket because its one of those Nextel walkie-talkie things -- which I also hate.

Some other things that suck, and then we'll move on to more fun topics. We're getting this etiquette class three times this week and basically all they needed to do was hand out a piece of paper saying, "David you don't belong here." They presented themselves as this ultra-hip, young cultured company, but now they're impressing on us the need to look like mission control engineers from the 1960's. Fuck that. I'm not taking out my earrings. That's ridiculous. All I do all day is sit in a cubicle. And they keep saying things like, "If you're not married yet, when you do get married you'll want to eat with proper etiquette. And guys especially when you take a girl out." I know that's petty, but they make comments like these all day long constantly ... everyone does. It would be nice to not feel alienated for like five minutes.

So the fun topics I promised: This weekend, my first weekend in Dallas, could not have been better. Ryan Short was having a party Saturday night, and I was on the ol' invite list. I went over to his house early so I could get ready to go out without the criticism of the matriarch. I helped him put lids on the obscene amount of jello shots and then people started showing up. JonSteed from College Station just happened to be in town and called me to see if I was doing anything, so I invited him to join me. I was grateful for him being there since I only knew a few cats and it was a little intimidating. There were like 70 queers sardined into Ryan Short's apartment. It was great. But it did get a little stuffy and hot (I should take a look at his HVAC system) so we moved the party to the bars. Starting off at JR's, JonSteed and I proceed to drink Pink Cape Cods like they were goin out of style. Then we stumbled over to the Village with a couple strangers and danced and drank some more. Neither of us remember the rest of the night clearly but I think it ended with us buying a shot and not having enough money, so we left.

Not much else of note happened, but hazy stumblings and drunken ramblings with people we did not know. We made it back to Ryan's where he and his brother were waiting for us to take them to ... where else? ... Whataburger! Fantastic. I spent the night at Ryan's cause I'm a lush and my mother didn't want me to drive home if I'd been drinking. I was happy to oblige. The next day we woke up and went to visit Ryan Short's friend, Greg, who lives in Addison Circle, where Ryan thought I might like to live. He was RIGHT! I fell in love. That's totally where I'm moving when I can afford it, which should be shortly. My first paycheck comes tomorrow -- can't fuckin wait. After we ate lunch and toured Greg's apartment we went and met up with Brent to go to a movie. So Ryan, Greg, Brent and I all rode to Stonebriar and met up with Chris Jones to see Stepford Wives, which I did not want to see, but I did want to meet new friends so I went. IT SUCKED. Real bad. Don't see it. Anyway, I just wanted to graciously thank Ryan, Greg, Brent and Chris for such a great time.

So that is what has been going on. Once I move out of my parent's house and get my own dedicated internet connection, I'll probably be more prone to get back into the updating swing of things, but as it is, I have precious little time to plug in and I don't always want to spend it narrating the past. But do keep checking back and emailing me and stuff, all the contact with my former life is a good thing. Peace out, have nots.

Went to IHOP late last night to break my diet. Stuffed french toast was worth every carb. Went to bed watching Waking Life. Good flick. Hard to watch when dozing off at 3:00am. It's a thinking movie, not a drinking movie. Woke up with no cough, good news. Woke up (early, as you can see) with pain in neck and shoulders so intense that sleep is not an option. A hot bath did not alleviate any discomfort. Perhaps some yoga will help. Otherwise agony continues. Hope you have fun in church today, suckers.

I got that outfit I wanted, but when I got home the shirt was fucking huge so I couldn't wear it. We got ready anyway and went to see Starsky and Hutch. I didn't bust out crazy laugh at all but I did laugh constantly through the whole movie. I would suggest it to all of you. The movie ran a little late so we had to call Christopher's to push our reservation back about 20 minutes. We went home and freshened up and then it was off to the restaurant.

Ohhhh emmmm geeee. We started off at the bar enjoying a couple glasses of wine while we waited for our table to be ready. There was a live jazz trio that was pretty cool. Our table was ready after only a short wait so we took a seat. We were so prim and proper all sitting up with correct posture and everything. It was so fun. Allison ordered the mediterranean salmon and I had a duck breast in a blueberry sauce. Holy fuck. You can't imagine how wonderful the food was. It came with all kinds of vegitable sides -- mashed potatoes, mashed sweet potatoes, some kind of greens, rice, and these little sweet potato crispy things. That's all I can remember. Needless to say it was fucking decadent. We also treated ourselves to a bottle of 2000 Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon. It was definitely not the cheapest bottle available, but not nearly the most expensive either. Delicious! Just when we thought we couldn't eat another byte, they had to bring around the dessert cart. A raspberry chocolate truffle?! Give me a break. I will do anything for raspberries. It was incredible. Allison's said "Happy Birthday from Christopher's" in chocolate around the edge of the plate. Very classy. Thank you for taking me, Allison!

We could barely move after the meal was over. Allison was out for the count, going home to go to bed, but I had social obligations. I was supposed to go that concert with Marshall. Unfortunately, I was too full to do anything. David27 came over and I slowly but surely got ready to go out. Sometime after midnight we finally ended up at Halo, had a few drinks, met up with Marshall, Sonia and Chevy, and then went home.

When we got home Owen was complaining that someone in the parking lot was playing Elton John's "Tiny Dancer" entirely too loud, so me and 27 went to tell them to shut up. It was two girls jammin out in a car after coming from Northgate. As it turned out, it was Erin, the girl that I got into an accident with in my parking lot. She was with her friend Courtney and they invited us to go back to Erin's apartment to party with them. She lives in the apartment like next to mine but upstairs. It was so close. We took some beer with us and sat on her porch drinking and smoking cigarettes and bullshitting. They were so cute and fun. They said they want to go out with us tonight to Halo and I'm totally going to invite them. I will have to let you all know how that turns out. Ryan Short is currently en route to College Station with 3 Dallas boys in tow. Tonight is sure to be crazy. More on that, after this....

This Friday is uber special. First off, I didn't go to class this morning. While there may be ramifications dealing with this oversight at a later date, it sure did make today more fun. So I just rolled out of bed at like 2pm and took a bubble bath. I spoil myself so. Now that I'm all clean, Thommi just asked me to go work out with him. Whatev, just an excuse to take another bath. Then we're gonna go to the mall and get me this new outfit I want that was out of my size when I last looked. So I'll be lookin fly tonight because ...

Tonight is my date with Allison for her birthday. She got her hair did and got a new outfit to wear. So we're both gonna be lookin spiffy. And we're going to Christopher's on someone else's tab. Wahoo. But before we go to dinner, we're going to go see Starsky and Hutch. Oh shit, I just realized I'm gonna be cuttin it close here with the time. Oh well. After the movie we're going to the Groove with Marshall to see Skyler Blue ... some local band that a guy he works with is in. They're supposed to be pretty good. Good enough for me to waste a cover charge to go see them, thats for sure.

Anyway, I hope you are all having as wonderful of a day as I am. It's not easy bein the Sidesho ... but somebody's gotta do it. Peace out, have nots!

I am so lucky. I'll give you twenty-seven guesses as to why but you'll only need one. These past couple weeks have been some of the best in recent memory. It's nice to have a constant partner in crime who likes to sit and watch home improvement shows and smoke too many cigarettes. I'll rip your face off and chop it in a million pieces.

In other news, Allison made reservations for us to eat at Christopher's on Friday. For those of you from out of town, Christopher's is the only nice restaurant in like a 100 mile radius. I'm really excited cause I've never eaten there before. Her parents said we could go eat there as a birthday present. Get excited! Then she bought tickets for us to see Starsky and Hutch but I already promised Marshall I would go see this band play at the Groove. We're gonna have to remedy that situation. I talked to Marshall and he was cool with it even though he said he wouldn't be if I tried to back out. But whateryagonnado? For my graduation Allisons parents are gonna pay for us to eat at Messina Hof. How fun is that? Maybe I should remind my parents that they didn't get Allison a graduation present and see if we can go to P.F. Changs in Houston or something.

I really want to go shopping before all the boys from Dallas get here on Saturday but I doubt I'm gonna have a chance. Ryan Short had so much fun during his night here out at Halo that he convinced like 10 of his friends from Dallas to come down and stay in a motel and get shitcanned College Station style. We're gonna be sure to show them how we do. Chevy is coming into town on unrelated business so I'm sure she (and hopefully Ms. Sonia as well) will join us in our revelry. If anybody else wants to join in just let me know. I'm planning on drinking on Saturday from about 7pm until about 5am. Which means this one will be on beer all night as to monitor my alcohol intake, since Aaron always tries to kill me and almost always nearly succeeds.

It's like 5am and Im just now starting to get to bed. Shouldn't have taken that nap tonight after waking up at 2pm. Oh well, I had fun doing it ... SO fun. Catch you sluts lata.

Ahh, what a week this has been. I haven't been to class all week. I place the blame squarely on jesus. I did make it to yoga today though, because as you all know, I do not miss yoga for any reason. Now I'm back on my signiture couch vegging out. I'm watching T3 again. I watched it last night with Raul, Tommy and David, but we didn't really pay attention. It has been out from Blockbuster for SO long now, but it's on Tommy's account so no worries here. I really should get it back at some point. We also watched Circuit. Believe it or not, I didn't like this movie despite the title. There wasn't one integrated circuit, resistive network, soldering iron, or pc board in the entire movie.

Today after yoga this girl came up to me and said, 'Hey do you ever hang out at Revolutions.' And by god, I do. She said she recognized my hair from the other weekend and wanted to tell me that she liked it. I hawked it today for the first time since the bleach incident. I've been kind of scared to put a flat iron to it in fear that it would just melt off.

Since the incident I've been doing just about everything I can to get my hair back to ... well, hair status. First I bought some shampoo and conditioner specifically designed for bleached, fried hair. That's helping a little bit. Then I did a protein pack on it, that was really good, I might need to buy a couple more of those. Finally, I got some Infusium leave in conditioner. All of this together, Pesci willing, will give me back the hair I once had. Wish me luck, have-nots. Back to T3...

Can I just say, I LOVE not having a job. And yeah, yeah, yeah, one of you fuckheads is gonna bring it up, "But what are you gonna do for money?" Well I don't care. I hate money. That's why I'm always trying to get rid of it so fast. Anyway, my school day ended at 10:00. How awesome is that. I was awake and had the whole day with nothing to do.

So the first thing I did was take a nap. Then I went and bought a book I don't want for a hundred bucks. Then I went to HobLob to hob knob with Marshall and buy a picture frame. Then I went to Academy Sports and Outdoors and bought a yoga kit. So now I have my own mat, strap, and blocks to play with. I also rearranged my bedroom so I have room to yogate in. I wanted to go see Blue October tonight over at the Tap (yes, I was actually willing to go to the Tap) but when I went to see if tickets were on sale this afternoon, they were sold out.

So as soon as Tommy got out of class and I got out of my bubble bath, I headed over to his place to go work out. I'm not sure what happened, but in between the time he got up from the chair to go put his workout pants on and the time he got back to the living room, I feel sound asleep. I've never fallen asleep so fast and so deep. It was crazy. I woke up a while longer and we went and worked out (apparently it was family night at the rec) and then sat in the hot tub. Then we went to see Butterfly Effect.

Holy crap. As you can see, on a scale of 1 to Incredible, I've rated it incredible. I was a bit apprehensive about Ashton in a serious role but he knocked this one outta the park. This movie was like woah. You've got to see it asap. I'm not even lying. If you disagree with me, you are wrong. I can't even really talk about it cause I'm still digesting. Me and Tommy were both blown away by it. Wow. Now I have to go to bed, even though my bed is possessed, but that's another story for another post. Good night!

Remind me never to go out sober again. God, what a dumb thing to do. It was still fun, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't like riotous fun like usual. And all my friends were drunk, which is fine by me, I'm hardly one to complain, but motivating drunk people to do anything (i.e. leave the bar) is next to impossible. So we didn't end up getting home until like 3am and then we watched Splash. What a good movie.

In other news, I had the most delightful email the other day that truly made me feel special. It was from none other than our good friend Dennis DiClaudio. You might recognize his name from the Grammar Cop section of my website. I don't know how he found me, but he did and he sent me this message:

hi,
just wanted to email you quickly and let you know how honored i am that you've quoted me on your website. when i found that, i went around smiling for three days straight.
thanks a lot,
dennis diclaudio

How cool is that? I would email him back and let him know, but I still don't have outgoing email. I could totally get my outgoing POP server information from the people who do our internet here, but I am far too lazy and they are far too inept to even deal with. I hate email anyway. I think Leslie and I are going to go to the mall and return some shit and then meet up with Justino to chaw on some steaks. You all wish you were me. Ciao suckers.

Well I'm back in College Station for a couple of days taking a sabatical from the holiday cheer of Plano. I was there for 3 days and that was enough for me. The first thing I did was put in my fake lip ring for when I first arrived. My mother went absolutely ballistic over it so I immediately had to reveal the joke whereas I had planned on wearing it all day. That kinda let some of the air out of my balloons, but it was still funny.

The next big fight was when I dared to walk down the stairs with my fauxhawk rawkin. My mother blew another gasket. She sure doesn't know how to pick her battles. Its not like we had company or anything, I was just going to sit around the house. So that was fun. I went upstairs and played guitar until my brother came home and took me with him to B&N. Oh speaking, the big news, I am going to be an uncle. Rachel, Stephen's wife, produced a couple sonogram pictures of the baby in her tummy. Thats exciting for us, even though she won't be able to participate in the booze cruise.

On Christmas we didn't exchange gifts, which, I gotta tell you, was the best Christmas I ever had. No shopping, no worrying, no wrapping, no fighting crowds ... just a family gettin together to play cards and drink liquor. I had my first taste of Courvoisier, and second, third, fourth, and fifth. I'd have to say I was a big fan. We played some Oh, Hell with everybody, ate some desserts with family friends and then went to bed.

The next day I went to see JennyCole and her family. Thats always fun. Then I went downtown to hang out with Ryan Short. We rode the rails to the Angelika Theater ... a new experience for me, v. classy. Then we ate at the cafe and saw 21 Grams. Worst movie ever ... don't go see it. Even though the movie was awful, I had a wonderful time. The next morning I woke up and drove home. And here I am. I spent last night drinking Coronas and Keystones with Josh 'n Tommy cause there was nothing else to do and nowhere else to go. It was fun.

Just thought I would fill you all in since I've been rather sparse in the updates in comparison to usual. I will be leaving tomorrow for the cruise and you won't hear from me until after the new year, so I hope everyone has a safe and wonderful new year full of drunken spirits and sloven kisses. Cheers!

I had planned on going to dinner with Marshall last night and then hanging out, but he ended up being 3 hours late, and Dustin and Trey were on their way to see The Matrix, so I decided to join them. I don't know what all the negative hype about this movie is all about. I thought it was fukken badass. Granted, I am easily impressed with fancy special effects, wire tricks, and kung fu, but gimme a break, that was so awesome. The fight between Agent Smith and Neo was so out of control I can hardly think about it. Anyone who cries about the plot or the 'eastern philosophy' is a big whiny baby who should be banned from movies as cool as this anyway. They were fighting so fast that the rain couldn't even hit them. Yeah, you thought it was rain.

If I talk about it anymore, I'm going to reveal too much and I don't want to spoil a movie as good as this for anybody else. Chances are, I'll be going to see it again a few times.

On another note, plans for Thanksgiving have changed. It turns out everyone and their dog is going to be out of town for Thanksgiving. Mostly because no one is going to the game. This dude wrote into the Battalion today yelling at the 12th Man (AGAIN, what is up with this resurgence of uber Aggies this year?) about how so many people were selling their sports passes. I had to laugh ... all the way to the bank, that is. I sold mine for $60. Like I give a shit. I'd much rather have the cash. Anyway, so no one is going to be in town for my Thanksgiving, and I do it right, so I don't want anyone to miss out. Also, AllieD invited me to join her family for dinner so they could get it catered by Luby's. It should be delicious and stress free. Throw in a little booze and you've got a right proper Turkey Day.

I've been watching Thanksgiving Week on Food Network and it is so awesome. I think this year I'm going to make my own stuffing. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I'm still having my own Thanksgiving, just not on that day. As you all well know, I am so cool that I can have Thanskgiving whenever the fuck I want. So maybe a week or two after the real deal, we'll have my shindig. I'll keep you all posted. Now, go get drunk.

I saw Kill Bill (vol 1). This is the movie where Britney Spears dresses up like Bruce Lee and fights with swords. I have yet to enjoy a "Quintin Tarrentino" movie that I've seen, so it shouldn't surprise me that I didn't appreciate Kill Bill. However, I will say that there were many, many redeeming qualities that I hope and pray some filmmaker I enjoy will steal and use. Fighting in the dark with nothing but shadows -- very cool. Excellent wire effects. Great soundtrack, all fights should be set to cool music. On the negative side: ridiculous amounts of gore ... I got a little queasy at a couple parts. Anime is not cool, not even when you try to be artsy about it. That's my official review. It was worth the money, but just barely.

I spent yesterday running around town putting together my Halloween costume with Allison. We're doing the themed thing again. As soon as I'm done sewing, we'll take a picture and I'll throw it up here. Until then, hold your breath.

Have I said lately how much I enjoy Martha Stewart. She is so great. And truth.com ads drive me to smoke more. Not surprising that they are funded by Phillip-Morris. Smart people working there. Evil, but smart.

Lastly, I got a shoutout from the past today that absolutely made my day. Anytime people tell me they read my webpage (which has been happening a lot lately, I'm starting to blush) it makes my day, but this one was from my old elementary school flame.

MissyHo12: i just had to give a shout out to my boyfriend for 3-5th grade. wanted to let you know that i frequent your website and find it laugh out loud hysterical! thought i'd say and let you know that! take care

I took a midterm today that I think I bombed. That sucked and it was very stressful. My boss is in China for a week now so I have yet to make it to work this week. And I'm broke. Like absolutely broke. That is all I have to update you on for now. Viva la vid.

I had two goals for this weekend. First, I wanted to get really, really drunk. Not a problem. My other goal was to accomplish absolutely nothing. Its a hard goal to accomplish because you're never really sure when you've finished it, but I know that I did it because of a little thing I've dubbed the couch-a-thon.

They kind of went hand-in-hand because my fabulous hangover kept me from wanting to do anything. I woke up on the couch the next morning and proceded to drink dr. peppers and lie about. I spent the whole day watching food network until Josh IMed me and said he was going to make some sloppy joes. He just lives two seconds away, so I actually got up and went over there. But dont' worry, because all i did was lay down on his couch. We saw the coolest show on ABC called Swapped or Switched or something like that. Check it out.

I went home after that and laid down on the couch until Allison called. We ventured briefly to Blockbuster but it smelled like ass in there so we went to Hastings. I bought The Transporter and 8 Mile on VHS cause they were cheap. So we went to Allison's to watch The Transporter and I laid down on her couch. As soon as that was over, back to my couch I went, and chatted with Neumann until 6am. I haven't talked to that guy in like 4 years, so that was a little surreal but cool. I slept on the couch, and its now 3pm and I'm still here.

If you all had pledged a nickel for every hour I could sit on a couch ... well, I'd have a shitload of nickels. So who is proud of me?

I'm about to save you all a lot of money, and keep you from wasting precious hours of your day. I have several hints to throw your way (Heloise style -- except these are actually applicable). The first deals with a movie that was released today called Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde.

Whatever you do, do not go see this movie. Under no circumstances should anyone pay to view this trash. If I had to pick one word to describe it, I would have to politely decline the proposition in favor of a slew of slurs. And it goes like this: This movie was trite, cheezy, slapstick crap. It was nonsequitor, unbelievable, and completely contrived. The characters were 2-dimensional props without brains whose decisions and feelings were unfounded and motivations unclear. Their main source of comedy was sexism, gay bashing, and all around stereotypes. The plot, albeit thin and patched together, managed to hold together long enough to suck throughout the entire length of the film. At one point I desperately tried to fall asleep, and at another, I completely had to leave the theater for a breather from the idiocy.

I may sound exceedingly critical of this light hearted movie, but there is a reason. I loved the first installment of this storyline. I thought the characters were great, and the idea behind it: to overcome adversity by being yourself, was a great message. Part 2 had none of this. No characters, no adversity, no message, no nothing. Absolute cinematic crap. I reiterate: Under no circumstances should anyone ever pay to see this movie.

The next 3 advisories deal with restaurants in College Station. After the lackluster theater experience, Allison and I decided to hit up a new restaurant to change the course of the evening. We began with Ozona Ranch. I don't have a huge complaint about that place except that the menu sucked. We sat, perused the selections, bitched about how the menu sucked, and then excused ourselves.

We headed to the new Mexican restaurant that now occupies the location that no restaurant can stay alive in for more than a couple of months. I don't remember the name of it. We walked in to be faced with a large sign at the front door that says, 'We are not responsible for lost or stolen items.' As if that isn't a red flag that this place is just a tad shady. So, while holding my wallet, we walked in and asked for a menu. Without even having to read it we knew we wanted to leave. There was a stereotypical Mexican man with a sombrero playing god awful Tejano music on a keyboard to entertain the guests. Not gonna do it. Especially when I'm already running the risk of being robbed.

So ... we walked over to Karrie's Stacked Enchiladas. Great food. Don't get me wrong. Really enjoyed the food. The staff, however, dear friends, left much to be desired. The hostess was hopped up on something. God knows what, but she would not leave us the hell alone. The bus boy kept trying to take Allison's plate before she was done eating so he could sneak a peak (all so slyly) at her breasts. I asked a waitress for a straw, and she all but fisted it into my drink for me, to which my response was to take it out and place it delicately on the ground. The manager was creepy. And another waiter wouldn't stop sprinting around the restaurant to bring people drinks and food. Good effort, but it kept making me think the building was on fire. Long story short, I'll never go to this place ever again.

So there you have it. You are very welcome. I save you money, I save you time. Tomorrow we depart for the river, and then Saturday night we will be partying like rockstars in downtown Austin. If any of you are going to be in the area, let me know. Ciao bellos.

Oh man, was Thanksgiving ever delicious. It turned out to be an awesome meal and even better company. Lets recap. I came home early from work to prepare the turkey and get it in the oven. Allisons stayed at my house to keep an eye (and a nose) on it while I went back to work to finish up for the day. When I got home, I smelled the turkey and got prepared for the other dishes. I was also responsible for the scratch macaroni and cheese. Its an old favorite of mine that my mom makes, so you know it contains mostly Velveeta. I also made the salad. And by "made" I mean I cut the bag open.

Allison was the champion of the evening being responsible for the most dishes. She made green bean casserole, candied yams, boxed mashed potatoes, gravy, and pumpkin pie. They were all delicious. Will showed up with a fancy schmancy loaf of bread that was enjoyed by all. Owen contributed a bottle of cabernet saviougne (or however the hell you spell that, I just tried to make it look French). The wine was a big success and his job of seasoning the mashed potatoes was not overlooked, even though the potatoes would have been better suited as an industrial strength adhesive than a side dish. Joseph also contributed a bottle of wine -- he was rawkin' the Hof. Once he decided to share we all enjoyed it very much. AllieD beefed up the dessert with some homemade brownies that I am still enjoying on a regular basis. She made way too many, but as long as I've got milk, I'm not complaining. Finally, there was Cappy who brought the cranberry sauce at the last minute to save the day after Joseph really dropped the ball.

After we all stuffed ourselves to excess, discussed our favorite pies, and finished off the wine, I headed up to Kroger with Owen to get another 30 Stones. When we got back, Allison popped in Old School and we drank and watched the movie. Next thing you know, the fuckin fridge is empty and I'm drunk. Who woulda thought. The crowd dispersed and I passed out ready to face another day hungover. I would have to say that last night was a blast and I can't wait to do it again the next time Thanksgiving rolls around (and who knows when that will be). Thank you to everyone who brought something and I will see the rest of you have nots ... on the flip side.

Sorry for the Dave Matthew's Band reference in the title, it was all that came to mind when I was trying to title a blog that I had so much to say in. Don't get me wrong, I like Dave Matthew's one song, I just don't think he should have been allowed to release it 15 times. Anyway, I haven't blogged in a really long time which means that half of the things I really wanted to tell you about are going to have to fall by the wayside.

I went to Dallas last weekend and had an absolute blast. I went shopping with Allison. She needed to pick up some make up. That was totally fun. I bought some rad new pants that I just debuted at Northgate on Thursday to rave reviews. I also got my hair cut and colored. I'm now the proud owner of black highlights. Who gets black highlights? No one does, thats crazy talk.

Work has been going well. I work long hours and have been fairly productive as of late. The gravity sickness is starting to go away and I'm actually kind of getting used to the space food. The strawberry dried ice cream isn't as bad as the vanilla that I'd been eating. I have to do a spacewalk next week that I'm a little nervous about but it shouldn't be too bad.

Brandon just came in town this past week as well as this afternoon. He was subleasing his apartment for the summer and had to fill out some paper work on both of those days. We went to go see Finding Nemo with Allison. I highly recommend. I haven't laughed that hard in a while. Of course I also cried, but what movie do I not cry in, am I right? We saw a preview for a new Will Ferrel movie where he's an elf. If you get the chance to see the preview the movie looks absolutely hilarious. Its coming out in November.

Damnit, I know there are way more things I wanted to talk about but they'll just have to wait or be omitted because I'm sick of typing. I haven't been very dedicated to the blog as of late and the numbers are starting to suffer, but fret not, this happens like every summer. Soon enough we'll be back to the daily blog fest and you will all be able to satiate your insatiable appetites for all things ViD. Have a great weekend. LAaaaaaaaaate

Last night I got out of lab and got home around 11:00 at night. Allison had decided that we were going to Northgate, so she showed up with a couple of beers to drink real fast before we left. We ended up getting there around 11:30. Omega, the place was off the heezy fo sheezy. It was so damn crowded there. You all know how much I hate crowds.

We started off at the Dry Bean, and ended up there later too. In between shots though, we met up with Allison's whole posse at Fitzwilly's and had a beer, and then a drink at MadHatters. MadHatters is really the place to be as of late. Its where all the cool kids hang out. I also ran into Steve-o there. Steve-o said that he visits my webpage every day but that I never mention him. Always aiming to please, as I do, I'm gonna mention him a few more times, and in bold, no less. Its convenient because the rest of our story revolves around Steve-o.

Steve-o and all of his friends are really fun to hang out with and party with, so I jump on it every chance I get. He was leaving to go to Betsy's house, so I tagged along. When we got to his car, Steve-o decided he shouldn't drive, so I took the keys. This girl Shannon that was with us was about to pee her pants so we stopped off at my house first. I grabbed the remaining beers from my fridge and we continued on to Betsy's house. Betsy and some guy, I think his name was Mike, were watching Office Space. Thats always fun. I drank my beers and had a good time like always. Next thing I know, I blinked and I was sitting in the same exact chair in the same exact position, only it was bright outside. So I was like 'umm okay.' Steve-o had to work at 11, and drive out to Iola beforehand to change clothes, so he was up early. When he was ready to go we got in his car and he took me home. I promptly showered and went back to bed until it was time to go to lab. I was in lab all day. We got wireless communication kinda working. It works sometimes. Thats cool.

Not sure what's on the menu for tonight. I'm still trying to find something or someone to do. If you would like to get some major name drops on my page, like Steve-o you'd best be callin me to hang out with me tonight. Or, just hang around Northgate and I'm sure I'll be there soon enough. Alright, skillets, I'm gonna head to the flip side. See you all there.

Well folks, the day finally arrived. As you can see on the webcam pic there, I now have an Aggie Ring around my finger. It was very exciting and gratifying to put it on for the first time. Now I'll finally get the respect I feel I so deserve. So I went out celebrating last night. To Northgate, of course. I went with Ryan, Brandon and AllieD. I drank way too much, but it was a complete blast as always. We went all around drinking and talkin and seein friends and then took CARPOOL home, which is always a blast.

I'm going to the mall now with Todd to spend my Structure fastcash, and then I'm going to see 8 Mile at 3:45. Its gonna be so good. Tonight I'm just gonna take it easy. No drinking tonight. Whoohaaaa. Peace out you have nots.

Spider-Man is finally here on DVD. I'm so excited. I bought it yesterday but only got around to watching it once. I'm sure more viewings will follow this weekend. Then its back to the grindstone for me. I also bleached my hair yesterday. I haven't dyed my hair in so long, but I have been wanting to since day 1. And I decided to get it cut today, so short and blond I go again. I'll get a pic up here as soon as the final product is unveiled. Not sure whats on the slate for tonight, I kinda feel like gettin' kronk. One final note, I made this today and I don't know why. It serves me no purpose, so I thought I'd share it with all of you, so at least its not a total waste. Ahhh color! Peace, i'm outta here.

Hey kids. Boy have I ever not been in the mood to blog lately. That just happens sometimes, y'know. Like you get into the groove of blogging nearly every day for a long time and then suddenly its the last thing you wanna do with your time. Anyway, I'm back now. You've sure missed out on a lot of good stuff, but thats half the fun of me not blogging is you not knowing whats going on, so instead of trying to catch up, I'm just gonna talk about yesterday.

I woke up a little hungover so I spent the morning eating a nice breakfast I cooked for myself, drinking water and juice, and taking a shower. I felt much better after that, and it was such a beautiful day that I couldn't help but be in a really good mood. Keith and Matt left for Dallas to go to the Who concert so I had the place to myself. I decided to turn off the AC, open up all the windows and turn on all the fans. Not only did I air the place out but it felt so good. I had the digital cable music station blaring as I vacuumed and dusted and disinfected. The place is currently spotless. We'll see how long that lasts. So when I was done, I decided to get ready to go to the football game against Vergina Tech. I like to wrap my knees to facilitate standing thru the entire game, so I did the tight ace bandage, metal supported brace combination. No one knows I'm wearin it though cause my overalls go right over it. Man was it hot at the game, especially in these overalls. But it was so fun. Well, besides the fact that we had 3 über-bitches standing next to us all in a huff cause they thought we were in their seats. Whatever. It was just me and Allison so instead of trying to squeeze into our seats, we just took some empty room a few rows back. It wasn't a big deal though, cause they were only there for one quarter and we left before halftime to go down for senior yell so they were only bothering us for like 8 minutes.

Senior Yell was awesome. We went down and lined up and I saw so many people I knew down there. It was like a little '03 reunion. We got to go down on Kyle Field while the Fightin' Texas Aggie Band was doing their show. Then we did two yells and welcomed the Aggies back onto the field. I could have SWORN I was on the jumbo-tron, but so far no one had seen me. The guy with the camera was panning our faces and I had the camera RIGHT in my face for a few seconds, so if it was on the jumbotron then I was too. If you saw me, please let me know. After that they herded us off the field and we went and found a new place to stand in some room of people that left after the band played. The game kinda sucked, mostly cause we lost, but I still had a blast. I got really sunburned in the face, like I knew was gonna happen. But despite all that, it was too fun. Certainly better than sitting up in one of those boxes. Thats just a random opinion of mine, not directed toward anyone.

After that, my brother Stephen was in town, so he came over to see my place. Then we went to go eat at Rockfish. Once again, I ate seafood and enjoyed it. We both got seafood enchiladas. I also ate a shitload of peanuts. Blech. Anyway, I also had a couple beers with dinner, and then stuffed myself with enchiladas, so when we got back we laid around and watched TV, and then Stephen went back to Houston. Almost needless to say, immediately I fell the fuck asleep for a good couple of hours. Allison finally woke me up by coming over to see what I was doing since I wasn't online, and I wasn't answering my phone. Then I went over to her place and watched Super Troopers. It was a pretty funny movie, I would recommend it to all of you without hesitation. After that I got online for a while, did some real nice chatting, drank a couple beers. Keith got home and we went to Taco Cabana at like 4am. Good times, I haven't done that in a while. Now its Sunday and here I am. I don't have shit to do today, so I ain't gonna worry about nothing. Maybe I'll go lay out or something. You know how I do. Anyway, now you're all up to speed, no more complaining. Czech you skillets later.

Oh, and download the new song of the day. Its the JAM, seriously.

Hey all. I'm about to run out to see My Big Fat Greek Wedding with Allison and skip out on open lab hours. Me and Owen (my lab partner) got a lot more done today than anyone else, so its time for another break. I had a fairly productive day despite the rain. I went and pulled a couple football tickets for Vergina Tech on Saturday. Me and Allison are just going together. Its too hard to coordinate a big group for us. Then I went and cut the sleeves off my Harley Davidson shirt cause they were bothering me. Then I ran into both Justin and Arash each on opposite sides of the campus (both of whom you'll remember from the towing blog). So that was fun. Then I had my Symphony class where I fell asleep, and then my lab, which I already discussed. Which brings me to the now.

This is off the topic, but me and Keith watched Wayne's World last night while we ate, and I made a comment about how much of that movie is in my regular rotation of phrases. And as we watched it, i kept count of how many lines from the movie I use on a daily, semi-daily (or even hourly) basis. The count got way into the double digits. Lets just put it that way. It made me kind of sad.

On another note, I told you all I would let you know how Jay's endeavor in the ToughMan competition turned out. This thing went against everything I believe in, but I found myself being very entertained. Jay 'Soda Popinski' did not advance past the first round. He lost after 3 one-minute rounds in a unanimous decision. It wasn't all for naught though, because he made the front page of our school newspaper today. And I felt obliged to share it with all of you. Gotta run, check you all latah.

I think I have a lot to talk about. I haven't blogged in a couple of days. So sit back, relax, and strap yourself in for this fast paced eye popping blog of all blogs. Okay thats a total lie. Anyway, what's been goin on? Wednesday passed like any other day, not much to talk about there. Thursday a lot of little things happened.

In my archery class we got to select bows. I chose a left handed 26 pound bow. I am left eye dominant so I'm taking the instructor's advice and firing left handed. He said initially it will be harder, but a better idea in the long run. And since I'm going to be a complete natural at archery, I want to be as good as I can be down the road. On Tuesday we actually get to fire arrows. I'm so excited.

On my way back to main campus from archery, my friend Nadia called me just to see what was up. I have a large break in between classes so I met up with her outside of the Bright Building just to say hi and bullshit. On the way, I ran into Adam, the guy who was in our speech class with us. We chit chatted for a little while and then parted our separate ways. The rest of the day was a total bore of class and stuff. But I did not go to open labs for the first time this week. It was a nice break. Instead, AllieD invited me over for dinner. She made beef strogonoff (if anyone knows how to spell this word I would greatly appreciate it). It was so damn good. She made a LOT tho, and it was just the two of us, so we ended up completely gorging ourselves while we watched Van Wilder (an excellent flick, I highly recommend).

After that I wanted to come home, get ready and go out. Turns out Allison was (a) in a good mood and (b) wanting to go out. So we actually went to Northgate just the two of us. That doesn't happen too much. We had a friggin blast. Well I know for sure I did, and I'm pretty sure Al did too. We started off at the library. I ran into some of my friends and we all shared a table. Allison had a Cosmopolitan cause she was already looking fabulous so she wanted to accentuate the obvious. I had a Jack and coke cause I'm a simple man with simple tastes. After that we went to Duddley's and drank some beers until they kicked us out. I completely forgot that we had parked in the garage, so I was thinking that Moore Hall was on the way to my car, so I made Allison go all the way over there cause I had to piss like a racehorse and everywhere on Northgate was locked. Burns let me in, and we chilled for a minute. Some guy was riding around on a skateboard, so Allison told him she had a phone call for him. It was the 80's and they wanted their skateboard back. Needless to say, she wasn't making friends. So we split. I got home, drank a few beers, chatted for a while, and then went to bed.

Today I woke up at like noon, didn't bother showering, went to my Symphony class. Then I did this assignment for my 349 class and turned it in, and now I am home. End of story basically. Tonight, me and Keith are going to the Toughman Competition. Our friend Jay has decided that it was necessary to gain like 7 pounds in order to be able to fight in the lowest weight division. He's going to get in the ring, hit somebody he doesn't even know as many times as he can, and I suppose its gonna prove something. Whatever the motivation though, we're so there. I know I shouldn't complain about the idiocy of such a contest when I'm funding it with my ticket price, so I'll try to keep an open mind going in. We'll see though. I'll let you all know how it goes. Til then ... be cool, stay in school.

Not a whole lot has changed recently, dear friends. My room is still in disarray, though the living room is starting to come together. I've had a bit to drink. There was a keg out back one night, and that was a good time had by all. We know everyone on our street it seems. Lots of cool neighbors. Turns out the girl that shares our wall is a girl I've known for like 2 years. So thats a load off, no cranky neighbors.

I'm rather distracted right now, I'm trying to blog and watch Gone in 60 Seconds at the same time and its not really working. Unfortunately, you all lose. I'm gonna concentrate on the movie. Peace out kids, if anything exciting happens, I'll let you know.

I spent almost all of yesterday with Allison. She called and woke me up to come eat lunch with her at the Cotton Snatch, where she works. So I got up, threw on a clean shirt and headed out there. I had Brocorri Cheese soup and a salad. Allison had a glass of water and a crouton. Then we went to Kroger and did some brief grocery shopping and went back to Allison's pad. We hung out there for just a little bit and then headed over to the mmmovie theater to see Austin Power's in Goldmember. I really enjoyed the movie. At times it was slow and at times it was the opposite of funny. But it was overall generally entertaining at all times. The real key was that when it was funny, ohmigod, it was hilarious. So I was either looking at my watch wondering when it would end or having a groin grabbingly good laugh. I would definitely recommend seeing this movie.

After AP, Allison wanted to stop by Academy sports and outdoors, the right stuff the right price. So we did just that. Turns out, all their summer stuff was on sale. And I've been wanting a new beach towel cause my Darth Maul towel from like 2 or 3 years ago just isn't doing it for me anymore out poolside. So I got a new towel for like 6 bucks. I've also wanted a new suit cause I had swimming laps in board shorts. So I got a more sensible lap swimming suit for like 5 bucks. Its ugly as hell, but the only one left in my size. Then I bought a sleeveless workout shirt for about 6 bucks and a pair of A&M workout shorts. I have a new workoutfit, which I unveiled last night to RAVE reviews, I'm sure. I also bought a pack of undershirts, because all of mine seem to say FUCK on them in one fashion or another. What a dirty little habit of mine. Anyway, after that we decided to slurge once again and go to On the Border for dinner. I got some chicken enchiladas and Allison had a light salad with dressing on the side. After that I came home and slept until I woke up around 10:30 and went to go work out. I just woke up today and nothing has happened yet so I'll have to tell you about it tomorrow. Excelsior!

What a crazy and fun Friday night. That's how they should all be. The evening began at Fazoli's with Keith to get some dinner. I had the lasagna with broccoli. It looked gross but tasted great. The breadstick girl gave me attitude because I made fun of her for flirting with Keith. I was chewing on a lemon and she came by to tell me that she used to eat lemons when she was little. So I said, "Yeah, well I used to be fat when I was little." No I'm kidding, but that's what the old immature me would have said. I didn't really retaliate except by making her throw my trash away.

After I was fetted and full, I went to Ryan and Todd's to commence the binge drinking session. We played 6-Cup, our favorite drinking game. Its a lot like Power Hour in that you don't ever have to really drink all that much at once, but after you've been playing a while, it hits you pretty hard. I was playing with Ryan, Todd, David, and Joseph. Sometime around 3am everyone started passing out, but me and Joseph were still wide awake. I got a call from Allison telling me she was at a killer party and that I should stop by. So I called Keith and had him drive me and Joseph over to Allisons.

When we got there, there was no alcohol except for some Skyy drinks that belonged to some girl. So we drank those, but we weren't supposed to so we had to disguise the fact that we were drinking these bright blue bottles. I put mine in a Keebler's Crackers box, and Joseph hid his in a neon yellow fanny pack. Soon after we got there, everyone started going home or passing out, which sucked. We could have passed out on the floor of Allison's duplex, but I really wanted my bed and Joseph was gonna sleep on my couch. There was only one way to make it home though ... and that was to walk.

For those of you who are familiar with College Station, we walked from Welsh & Southwest Pkwy to Texas & Holleman. Its pretty damn far and it was a little chilly. We ran into one guy who was sitting on his porch smoking a cigarette so we stopped and had a smoke with him. I don't remember if he was cool, but we'll just say he was. By then it was probably around 4am. We happened to be walking right by Leslie's apartment, and despite the fact I hardly ever talk to her anymore, I decided I would like to see her so I called her cell phone. She didn't answer but I left a message that said "Hey it's David. I'm just about to walk by your apartment and thought I'd stop by but you must be sleeping," And we continued on.

A couple minutes later, we're a ways down the sidewalk and I hear this faint "DAAAAAVIIIIID!" Turns out Leslie had just listened to my message, so I yelled back and ran back to her apartment. We stopped in there and chilled for a while though all we had to drink was water, since we were a bit parched from the walk. I saw this guy I went to school with from like K-8 grade and he didn't remember me which offended me. I mean, I probably haven't seen him in like 8 years, but still. I remember everyone from my elementary school. Well, around 4:30, I think, we left Leslies to finish off the walk home.

When we got back to my apartment, we made some Easy Mac and drank a bunch of water. Keith came home and was enjoying our drunken antics as Joseph tried to make some tuna concoction to eat. It was pretty funny. I think we went to bed around 5 or 5:30am.

To sum up the evening, it was exactly "how I do." Every Friday night should be as adventurous. I woke up around 2:30 today and went to Wal-Mart with Allison and Keith. I didn't buy anything, but we did stop by GNC and get some of those candles that you burn in your ears. Its odd, look 'em up, I'll let you know if they work. Oh, also, in Wal-Mart I kicked a ball into this toddler's face. It was hilarious. Tonight I'm gonna go to Allison's to eat lasagna and watch Life as a House, which is an EXCELLENT movie. So, I'll catch you kids later. Excelsior!