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I'm about to save you all a lot of money, and keep you from wasting precious hours of your day. I have several hints to throw your way (Heloise style -- except these are actually applicable). The first deals with a movie that was released today called Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde.
Whatever you do, do not go see this movie. Under no circumstances should anyone pay to view this trash. If I had to pick one word to describe it, I would have to politely decline the proposition in favor of a slew of slurs. And it goes like this: This movie was trite, cheezy, slapstick crap. It was nonsequitor, unbelievable, and completely contrived. The characters were 2-dimensional props without brains whose decisions and feelings were unfounded and motivations unclear. Their main source of comedy was sexism, gay bashing, and all around stereotypes. The plot, albeit thin and patched together, managed to hold together long enough to suck throughout the entire length of the film. At one point I desperately tried to fall asleep, and at another, I completely had to leave the theater for a breather from the idiocy.
I may sound exceedingly critical of this light hearted movie, but there is a reason. I loved the first installment of this storyline. I thought the characters were great, and the idea behind it: to overcome adversity by being yourself, was a great message. Part 2 had none of this. No characters, no adversity, no message, no nothing. Absolute cinematic crap. I reiterate: Under no circumstances should anyone ever pay to see this movie.
The next 3 advisories deal with restaurants in College Station. After the lackluster theater experience, Allison and I decided to hit up a new restaurant to change the course of the evening. We began with Ozona Ranch. I don't have a huge complaint about that place except that the menu sucked. We sat, perused the selections, bitched about how the menu sucked, and then excused ourselves.
We headed to the new Mexican restaurant that now occupies the location that no restaurant can stay alive in for more than a couple of months. I don't remember the name of it. We walked in to be faced with a large sign at the front door that says, 'We are not responsible for lost or stolen items.' As if that isn't a red flag that this place is just a tad shady. So, while holding my wallet, we walked in and asked for a menu. Without even having to read it we knew we wanted to leave. There was a stereotypical Mexican man with a sombrero playing god awful Tejano music on a keyboard to entertain the guests. Not gonna do it. Especially when I'm already running the risk of being robbed.
So ... we walked over to Karrie's Stacked Enchiladas. Great food. Don't get me wrong. Really enjoyed the food. The staff, however, dear friends, left much to be desired. The hostess was hopped up on something. God knows what, but she would not leave us the hell alone. The bus boy kept trying to take Allison's plate before she was done eating so he could sneak a peak (all so slyly) at her breasts. I asked a waitress for a straw, and she all but fisted it into my drink for me, to which my response was to take it out and place it delicately on the ground. The manager was creepy. And another waiter wouldn't stop sprinting around the restaurant to bring people drinks and food. Good effort, but it kept making me think the building was on fire. Long story short, I'll never go to this place ever again.
So there you have it. You are very welcome. I save you money, I save you time. Tomorrow we depart for the river, and then Saturday night we will be partying like rockstars in downtown Austin. If any of you are going to be in the area, let me know. Ciao bellos.
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