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Tomorrow is going to be so fun. Despite the fact that I have to get up extra early for a branch meeting that pertains to nothing I do, I have my own fun cooked up. I got a package today that I ordered off the internet. Its contents are:
- one stapler ... that shocks the shit out of you when you close it
- one pen ... that shocks the shit out of you when you click it
- one lighter ... that shocks the shit out of you when you flick it
- one beer can ... that shocks the shit out of you when you pick it up
This has become mine and Trey's new favorite joke at work. He already has the pen. We put up a sheet of paper with everyone's name on it with the title "Trey's Labor Day Party" and hung it outside his cube. Then we attached the shocker pen with a string and everyone's name had two check boxes out beside it for whether or not you would attend. Kind of like a really primitive evite, if you will. Then all day long, we laughed our asses off as one by one, people came up to check next to their names and received a jolt.
Trey also has a little mini slot machine that fits in the palm of your hand. The entire casing is naturally made of conductive metal. When you pull the handle it shocks the shit out of you. That one's fun because you can get people to do it without any prompting, just by setting it out. So we're going to litter our cubes with electrified items. I realize it may only sound mildly amusing in print, but imagine yourself in a stuffy office with a boring ass job where the most exciting thing that ever happens is memorizing the 400th digit of pi. That makes it absolutely hilarious.
I was thinking about getting a fish at work, since I get lonely with Tuna at home all day long. I really don't want him to go to work with me though, since he'd just be bored and get all pissy with me. I wanted a red fish, to kinda be his Bizzaro World counterpart. Kind of like a red fish, blue fish, one fish, two fish deal. But I wasn't sure that I was allowed to have a fish and since my cube is DEVOID of any decoration or personality, he would surely stand out. Well these two ladies that I work with came back from lunch today with bettas and I am exceedingly jealous. Even though they're like 50, they were still slinking in the back door so they wouldn't get caught. No one really knows if its allowed, but no one's really asking. So I might have to get another fish sometime soon and sneak him into work real early one day. It would keep me so very entertained.
Last bit of news. I have hitched a ride on the responsibility train. Toot! Toot! I have decided that I spend far too much money on stupid shit when I should be taking advantage of my economical situation by stock piling money. So I'm taking all of my extra cash and putting it into an ING account that has a higher interest rate than my checking account. I haven't exactly stopped spending money recklessly, as I usually do, but I have decided that I am no longer going to buy anything for anybody but me. My apologies to those of you who never got to experience a dinner from me, or drinking on the town with my tab open, but that has just got to stop. If I'm going to waste money, I should at least waste it on me. And in the meantime, maybe save enough for furniture and decorations for my new apartment that I'll eventually get. Maybe even tomorrow! I have an appt with the people at Addison Circle to look at some apartments that will be vacating soon. I hope I find one I like. I love living at home and I could do it forever ... but I can't do it forever. Might as well go on and get the hell on with the rest of my life. It's not like my house will be far away. I can still come home for dinner, or groceries, or bottles of booze or whatever I need. Ha!
I still have an extra ticket to see Mitch Hedberg and Stephen Lynch in Austin on October 2nd since Chevy won my little contest and then declined the prize, so LET ME KNOW if you are interested in going. Also, I have no plans for tomorrow night and it's payday, so I need to get stupid (disregard paragraph above) so somebody invite me out. And finally, to each and every one of you, have a wonderful Friday ... or not, the choice is yours.
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