I have spent the morning watching X-Men cartoons and Full House re-runs. Does life get any better than this? I'm starting to wonder. My apartment is badass. There is still a lot to do in the way of putting stuff away and decorating and buying a few pieces of furniture, but it is more than adequate in its present state. I love the neighborhood that I live in. Faux-Euro ... what could be more me? The bars within walking distance are great. I went to one called the Velvet Hookah the other night and drank halfpriced martinis and smoked cantaloupe flavored tobacco from a hose.
The job is starting to go really well. After 4 months of pushing the rules, I am almost satisfied with my position. You're not allowed to have facial hair. Your hair cannot fall past your collar, because you're supposed to wear a collar every day. Your retracto-ID badge must be visible at all times. The work day starts at 8am and ends at 5pm with a 1 hour lunch. Well those are the rules that apply to everyone else anyway. The other day I was so hungover from the Velvet Hookah that I left work at 9:30, went home and got in bed. I woke up about 3 hours later feeling much better and went back to work after grabbing some lunch. Nobody even noticed. I am the worst employee ever.
I was afraid that my Grammar Cop section was going to have to end because I've quoted the whole of Dennis DiClaudio's website and was out of material. Fear not, kiddos. I just bought a book the other day called Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation. It's got a picture of a panda bear erasing the comma in the title. Get it? I love this book. Look for hilarious quotes to pop up in the future.
And the final bit of news. I need your opinion on this. In the past month I have heard on a very regular basis that I look like Beck. I have heard it more and more since I've been growing my hair out. I also get David Spade a lot, and since someone told me that last night, it was fresh on the brain. Whadya think? Any similarities? Later, Nerdbombers.
