I've just rounded out the 6th hour of programming on the History Channel about the Kennedy family. I'm not sure why they're doing a marathon today, but I was completely enthralled in all of it. It's weird to think that was nearly 50 years ago. In keeping with my long standing traditions as the publisher and editor-in-chief of a conspiracy theories newsletter, I thought maybe I would offer my own theory as to the assassination of JFK.

I have seen all the recent computer regenerations and accurate recreations and I now am convinced that the fatal bullet came from the 6th floor window of the Texas School Book Depository Building. SIDENOTE: What the fuck is a book depository? That phrase has kind of become ingrained in our vocabulary because of this singular event, but has it ever occurred to anyone else how strange it is to have an entire building in the heart of downtown dedicated to the storage of text books? It is a seven story building for g*d's sake. Exactly how many books were left there? Why weren't they handed out to school children? I find the whole thing very suspect.

Anyway, modern forensics has sufficiently proven to me that the fatal wound came from that window -- but it has not convinced me that Oswald made the shot. In fact, what if he missed? What if he was really aiming at Jackie O? Tell me you weren't jealous of her pink Chanel suit. It would enrage anyone to want to take her out. Wind blows a little more than you accounted for and you've just accidentally shot the leader of the free world. Whoops. That's why it was such an impossible shot, because it was a pure fluke accident. That's my original conspiracy theory.

I should go to the 6th floor museum. I've never really been down to that area of town much less on a Saturday afternoon, but I was amazed while condo hunting that like 100 people were strewn out across the grassy knoll making hand gestures and angle measurements up to the window. Now that I will be living in Dallas for the first time, I have certain duties to know about interesting things to see/do in the city. And that one is a no-brainer for out of towners.

Moving day is rapidly approaching. The bar is destroyed. The walls are white. Several boxes are packed. We are well ahead of schedule and that makes me very happy. I'll keep you posted -- Moving Day Oct 30.