Infinite Toothpaste
Thursday, December 19, 2002 4:55 am

Hey, thanks to my friends and teammates for the abundance of comments. I'm not used to such a rousing response to a blog, but then, most of my blogs really suck. Today I took a final. I completely waxed it. I have this feeling that I got a 105 on it since there was a bonus, but you all know how modest I am, so I'm just gonna count on a 100. Then we worked on our fucking digital thermometer for like 12 hours. UGH! PS, thank you to EVERYONE who called me from Northgate to ask where I was and inform me that the semester was supposed to be over. Preciate that guys (and girls). We did sneak across for one beer just before last call, so that was the highlight of my fuckin night.

Anyway, I have another question to pose to you, loyal Sidesho-Viewers. Really, its more of an observation that might incite some thought. I think it is impossible to empty a tube of toothpaste. Its something I've always joked about, but this time around I decided to tempt fate and actually forgo buying a new tube of toothpaste despite the fact that mine was clearly 'empty.' Since I determined that my toothpaste was 'gone' 3 weeks have passed. And yes, I have been brushing my teeth twice a day on this tube of toothpaste. I think the relationship of toothpaste to time is asymtotic. I believe that it will never reach zero because there's always that last little bit you can squeeze out of the bottom. I'm not sure how to explain this phenomena ... perhaps a rift in the spacetime continuum?

I thought maybe you could share your thoughts. If you agree, or just mildly agree, or have experienced the same thing in your life. Also, any theories as to why this is so indesputibly true. Thanks for your comments in advance. Laaaaaaaaate.

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Nick

It’s the zero-point energy effect. Constant recreation and destruction of matter.



Burns

I’m a general studies major; i don’t understand physics or time or anything really. well, i do know brewery. yeah, but toothpaste utterly confuses me.



I am inveeencible

Dear David,
I have done what you speak of and you can verify this with Rachel. I have used a toothpaste toob until it was physically impossible for two people working in tandem squeeze any toothpaste from the tube. I saw it with my own two eyes. I would get a half millimeter of toothpaste to break the plane of the tube opening but any effort to recover that half millimeter would cause the toothpaste to retreat back into the toob. Maybe is we had three people we could have used it one more time . . .hmmmm



Justin

It’s like those retarded graphs in calculus, where it infinitly approaches zero, but never does. You might have mentioned that, I don’t really read the blogs, I just scan them.



ViD

Its called an asymptote … which I did mention. Thanks.



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